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Author Topic: Need advice on how to approach new friend (F) for intimacy/physical relationship

September 24, 2019, 10:59:52 PM
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My husband (M,48) and I (F,42) were in Mexico last week for a much needed vacation. We were staying a resort where we met a woman (F,39) to whom I was instantly attracted. The three of us struck up a conversation and quickly became friends. We ended up spending every day together and there was palpable sexual chemistry between both me and her, as well as between my husband and her. After our first day together, I asked my husband if he found her as attractive as I did, to which he answered yes. Nothing happened while we were there, other than some mild flirting and gentle touches. My husband and I have been happily married for five years and have never explored this (other than when discussing our sexual fantasies). We are now ready to take it to the next step and I would very much like to reach out to her and see if we can arrange a time and place to meet. She is a single mom, divorced for a few years and not currently seeing anyone. All three of us live in the U.S., but she lives in a different state than we do. Nevertheless, we have the means to plan to a trip to meet somewhere for a weekend. I need advice on how to approach her. How do I broach the subject without scaring her? Phone call? Email? Text message? Social media? As my husband said, we don't want to creep her out. I can't stop thinking about her and need help. I am so very bad at this, but my husband and I both think I should be the one to contact her.

September 25, 2019, 08:54:01 AM
Reply #1


Hi Major_Interaction

How are you?

 ''I need advice on how to approach her. How do I broach the subject without scaring her? Phone call? Email? Text message? Social media?''

If you felt that there was sexual chemistry between you three, then it should be easier.

Obviously the best way would be phone call. You can express and communicate your desires and feelings much more efficiently than through email or text message.

Tell her that you wanted to catch up, and during this conversation tell her that you found her very attractive, that you had a great time. If you feel you have a good rapport, be blunt! Tell her that you haven't stop to think about her, that you have never done that, and that your husband is on the same page. Worst that can happen is that she will take it as a compliment and will decline if she is not into it.

By not doing it, you will never know. It is better to ask for forgiveness than permission.

Also, if it is the first time for you and your husband, make sure that you dedicate a ''talk date'' on the subject. Like 30 minutes of open conversation, where you are laying done all the ''do's'' and ''don'ts'' that you are both willing to do.

It's a beautiful opportunity and an exciting experience that you will have here!


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