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Author Topic: What to do...

July 23, 2019, 06:23:14 PM
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ReneeOfHearts


My ex and I stopped talking 3 year ago after a horrible argument a fight. A lot of things were both said and left unsaid.

I recently ran into him twice while out shopping, the 1st time I tried to act like I didnt see him because it freighted me a little bit. The 2nd time the same.

After talking with a friend I decided to reach out to him via email to acknowledge that I noticed him. He responded and we were emailing back and forth for over a month now. Nothing to serious, but random things.

Last week I sent him a message asking if it was okay if we could meet up to chat......I haven't recieve a response.

I'm trying to give him space and time, but how long is too long to recieve a response.

July 25, 2019, 08:26:52 AM
Reply #1
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Leebawbs


It sounds to me like you both have some unresolved business. Did you both break up officially or did you just stop speaking with each other?

I think maybe a few days without a reply would be an indication that he doesn't want to talk... Is your reason for wanting to meet up just to discuss what happened between you two? Do you want to get back together with him?

July 25, 2019, 11:51:51 PM
Reply #2
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ReneeOfHearts


It was big mutual don't talk to me anymore break up.

I would like to talk about it and apologize. I've learned a lot over the past couple of years.

If he doesn't want talk, why tell me that he was thinking about me.or staring me down in the store.

I'm just not going to respond or follow up. I feel like if or when he wants to talk he will but I might not be receptive, it's been a long time and if he doesn't want to talk it's fine but he can at least just say that.

July 30, 2019, 01:56:38 PM
Reply #3
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ReneeOfHearts


So update!!

We ran into each other this weekend, randomly, After trying to be charming as if that still works on me  ;D, I asked him  why hadn't responded and he stated that he didn't want any drama.

So, I asked him why would there be drama and he said,usually I end up yelling at him and he is triggered and that's why he disappeared.

In turn, I asked him did he anticipate a reason for me to yell? And I told him I don't like to yell and that it is usually out of frustration. He basically apologized for disappearing because he knows it isn't right.

So then he asked me what is it that I wanted to talk about and told him a lot because there is a lot.

So he is supposed to "set up or figure out when" and let me know.  ???

August 03, 2019, 01:29:56 AM
Reply #4
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chrishen


People are different in person and will either default to:

Politeness + Eagerness
OR
Politeness + Ambiguity in order to be civil and keep things positive.

He didn't reply to your messages because he doesn't want to have any relationship with you, and that is the same reason why he gave you the ambiguous, "Yeh lets set something up" response.

Thats a nice way to say, "I'm not going to set anything up with you."

You should move on. The ball is 100% in his court and any more action from you will come off as needy and unattractive.