I went out with a girl for a bout 7 months. maybe more or less
I've never met a girl like her. The relationship was intense and strong. I had never felt so strongly in love about a girl.
Unfortuantely, at the time we were going out i had depression and lost my job. I never really too this girl out or showed her appreciation. Eventually she broke up with me. Our break up was messy, she wanted to break up but keep hanging out. I accepted this (mistake). She then started sleeping with other men. I got angry at her when i found out and reacted badly.
Since then we blocked each otheR. I felt really bad so i sent her a letter in the mail apologising for the things i said. She told me that her dad fund the letter and not to send a letter to her again just text next time. I don't thin she even read what i said

I literally cried and cried over her for months and months.
I ran into her at the gym a few weeks ago and we made small talk but that was it. It's clear she doesn't care at all about me. I thought maybe i could re spark something so i sent her a message asking her what restaurant did we go to when we went to that beach town and she didn't respond

Okay so i guess i' mover the heart break and over being sad. I feel better now. But i still think about her. I still get angry at myself for how i took her for granted and didn't take her out or show my appreciation for her. I've dated other girls asnd slept with many other girls but it just simply isn't the same. Will i be like this for the rest of my life? What can i do?
I'm so lonely. I work a boring isolating jobm i don't have many friends, i'm always tired and deprssed. I still miss her. It's been a very long time but my mind still returns to her. Her smile, her laugh, her eyes, her personality. Sucks.
what do i do? i'm still obsessed. I Still check her social media sometimes when i'm sad and depressed.