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Author Topic: Could we be working towards getting back together?

October 09, 2019, 05:02:57 PM
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So this is going to be kind of long. Please bear with me.

We started talking the end of Dec last year, started seeing each other January 11th. We were inseparable very early on, spending 95% of our time together and were only ever really apart when we each had our kids(we have them on the same weekends). Things were going amazing and we were both really happy.

Fast forward to the middle of June. We were on our way to the movies for a date when he told me his mom and sisters were worried about one of their sisters who wasn't answering her phone. We decided to stop so he could check on her, he went on alone and came out about 15mins later. And seemed a little distracted but okay. I didnt find out until later after the movie when were on the way home and his other sister called to see how the other sister was, that he had walked in and she had been cutting herself and was a wreck. Had I known we could have cancelled the date and he could have stayed with her. I felt horrible.  The next week was a mess he spent every night after he got off work until visiting hours ended at the hospital with her and I felt him withdrawing from me. He asked me to stay in town and I did for one night but then we were back to having me at his place.

  He continued to feel distant until 2 weeks later he got upset.  Said he didnt know what to do about us. That I was pretty much living with him(said it was on him just as much as me cuz he wanted me there all the time) and he wasnt ready for that, that it was too much and he needed space. I said I'd give him space and we tried that for another week, with me staying at my place. Then he let me meet his oldest kid(13) I was so excited because for him that's a big deal no one has ever met his kids,  I thought things were working.  Until the next day he ended it a week before we would have celebrated 6 months.  We said wed stay friends and we continued to talk.

A few days later we decided to be fwb because we both agreed that the sex was amazing and we wanted to continue that. And we promised to tell each other if either us started talking to someone else, and that if we decided to sleep with someone else wed  tell the other person and stop sleeping together. I found out about month later that he had been talking to another girl since right after the ordeal with his sister(which I think was a turning point in our relationship) and that they had slept together on more than one occasion.  I told her about me when I found out and she immediately cut him out of her life. I however have had a harder time.

Fast forward to now, a few days after the other girl situation unfolded, we started seeing each other every day again and it has been that way ever since.  We spend every night we dont have kids together. He has taken me out to dinner, took my out for my birthday.  Told me to tell him when I'm struggling financially so he can help and he has( helped pay my rent when I was short and helped me to buy gifts for my daughters birthday), he filled my car with gas.

While all this has gone on, he never told his family or his kids(who know about me) that we have broken up. As far as they all know we are still very much together.  He treats me amazing and is the kindest, sweetest guy I have ever known.

I dont know if things are going well because I have taken all the pressure off of us being an us and I no longer ask when i get to meet his kids(i did that alot becaus always said "soon") and I make sure to make a point of us being just friends. I want us to be more, but I dont want him to feel pressured.  He has never continued seeing an ex after breaking up with them before, so it makes me think he still has feelings there and that we could eventually work out way back to being an us again. Do you think this is a possibility?  Could he still have feelings and just be scared to let me in? Or am I wasting my time?


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