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Author Topic: What do I do with an emotionally unsupportive boyfriend?

August 13, 2020, 02:34:44 PM
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Lately I have been really down. It is due to a mixture of problems in my life. I won’t bore you. I’m unemployed due to COVID 19, clueless about what direction to take my future career in, my family never stop arguing and treat me like their door mat around the house. I’m just angry, frustrated and upset.

I try to confide in my boyfriend about how I’m feeling inside. I don’t know if I’m depressed or whether this is just a passing phase. When I talk about things he says nothing at all really. 2 days ago when I really had enough of it and confessed that I wished I wouldn’t wake up tomorrow - he responded in the most unsupportive way via text. See quotations.

“This is nothing in comparison to what you will have to face in the future. “

“The world doesn’t work the way you had imagined.”

“I have been in the same boat as you and I sailed through it.”

“This is reality. I don’t want to give you false hopes lol”

“The problems u had before were only the tip of the iceberg.”

I was in bed crying at the time. I understand that maybe it can be hard to have to listen to a person who is having problems and that you sometimes need to have a “tough love” attitude. Perhaps I over-do it now and then. I am not always like this and it is only occasionally that I talk about this stuff with him. However, I just feel the way he responded to my breakdown was extremely cruel and unsupportive. Whenever he is having a hard time I am always there for him. I listen and offer an opinion and try to reassure him of things. I am sure I will have to face harder times in life in the future, but this whole scenario has made me wonder if he really is the one that I want to be there for me. Or "be there." If things ever got really bad I would want a partner with a different attitude that will support me. We are 22 and have been together almost 5 years. I let little things like this slide before, but since this occasion has been more noticable, I cannot shake it off. Is this acceptable or am I just over reacting? I haven’t talked to him in almost 2 days because I’m mad and feel like he makes me feel worse. He texted me twice. He asked if I was mad. When I ignored his text he just said "okay." Nothing since. How should I deal with this? Any answers much appreciated.


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