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Author Topic: Should I tell him what I know and see how he reacts?

January 15, 2019, 04:33:18 PM
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Xojane07


Hi, I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year now, he is awesome, treats me like a princess, (him and I met in January 2018,) but in early 2017, he started going out and getting to know this other girl which was in his day to day work environment, according to him she was very successful in her management job, so she flirted with him, and with other guys as well, she was very flirtatious in general according to my boyfriend, and it seemed like she liked him.This girl was going through a rough time, her boyfriend had dumped her for another woman, who happened to be none other than back for his ex.

So my boyfriend liked her a lot, his feelings were developing rather quickly for this girl, than her feelings for him. So they went out a couple of times, but it didn’t work out, he did not like her way, he said, she was too insecure, indecisive, voluble, I guess that due to the fact that her boyfriend had dumped her for another woman,she was not emotionally well at that particular moment and perhaps was checking for other possible options.

He has mentioned her to me a couple of times, but then I got mad, cause why the need to mention her more that twice , so I told him To not mention her anymore, so yeah perfect, until the other day he says: I am very happy with you I am glad god put you in my way, I remember thinking it was this other girl (referring to her of course) honestly it would have never worked with her and I and all her drama, acting like she is the diva with all these men after her, she was a good person, hard worker, great job, but I just did not see her click with me.While he was telling me this his face was like if he was thinking a lot, like lost in the horizon.

So now, I happen to have a friend, who knows a guy that does helicopter tours all around where we live, and my friend happens to be this helicopter guy friend, and she showed me pictures of his Instagram, where he shows his helicopter pictures, basically his work, and guess what, this woman that my boyfriend went out with is On some pictures with this guy, and I had obviously seen her pictures before, so I recognized her immediately. And well I explained to my friend that I knew this girl in the picture, cause my boyfriend had gone out with her a couple of times in 2017.

So my friend replied:”oh really!!, her name is so and so and that’s his girlfriend since 2017, I was in shock!!! I was like how can this be if she and my bf were getting to know each other by that time!!. Now I understand, why maybe she was not so much into my boyfriend, I believe and have a theory that my boyfriend was a rebound for her, she got playful at the beginning, cause her boyfriend had dumped her, she needed attention plus a shoulder to cry, have a little fun and move on.

I would like to tell all of this to my boyfriend just to see how he reacts, if he has had real CLOSURE or not, cause I feel as if he had this woman on a pedestal by the way he has talked to me about her, maybe he just idealized her too much, and since she was (according to him)all the guys eye candy, he got infatuated with her, it’s like all the guys wanted her and he was the one that actually got a chance to go out with her a couple of times, cause some of her coworkers told him she “liked him”, so this is how it all started and then all of his male coworkers got mad at him, causehe was the lucky one.

January 20, 2019, 06:17:01 PM
Reply #1
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missg


Hi, I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year now, he is awesome, treats me like a princess, (him and I met in January 2018,) but in early 2017, he started going out and getting to know this other girl which was in his day to day work environment, according to him she was very successful in her management job, so she flirted with him, and with other guys as well, she was very flirtatious in general according to my boyfriend, and it seemed like she liked him.This girl was going through a rough time, her boyfriend had dumped her for another woman, who happened to be none other than back for his ex.

So my boyfriend liked her a lot, his feelings were developing rather quickly for this girl, than her feelings for him. So they went out a couple of times, but it didn’t work out, he did not like her way, he said, she was too insecure, indecisive, voluble, I guess that due to the fact that her boyfriend had dumped her for another woman,she was not emotionally well at that particular moment and perhaps was checking for other possible options.

He has mentioned her to me a couple of times, but then I got mad, cause why the need to mention her more that twice , so I told him To not mention her anymore, so yeah perfect, until the other day he says: I am very happy with you I am glad god put you in my way, I remember thinking it was this other girl (referring to her of course) honestly it would have never worked with her and I and all her drama, acting like she is the diva with all these men after her, she was a good person, hard worker, great job, but I just did not see her click with me.While he was telling me this his face was like if he was thinking a lot, like lost in the horizon.

So now, I happen to have a friend, who knows a guy that does helicopter tours all around where we live, and my friend happens to be this helicopter guy friend, and she showed me pictures of his Instagram, where he shows his helicopter pictures, basically his work, and guess what, this woman that my boyfriend went out with is On some pictures with this guy, and I had obviously seen her pictures before, so I recognized her immediately. And well I explained to my friend that I knew this girl in the picture, cause my boyfriend had gone out with her a couple of times in 2017.

So my friend replied:”oh really!!, her name is so and so and that’s his girlfriend since 2017, I was in shock!!! I was like how can this be if she and my bf were getting to know each other by that time!!. Now I understand, why maybe she was not so much into my boyfriend, I believe and have a theory that my boyfriend was a rebound for her, she got playful at the beginning, cause her boyfriend had dumped her, she needed attention plus a shoulder to cry, have a little fun and move on.

I would like to tell all of this to my boyfriend just to see how he reacts, if he has had real CLOSURE or not, cause I feel as if he had this woman on a pedestal by the way he has talked to me about her, maybe he just idealized her too much, and since she was (according to him)all the guys eye candy, he got infatuated with her, it’s like all the guys wanted her and he was the one that actually got a chance to go out with her a couple of times, cause some of her coworkers told him she “liked him”, so this is how it all started and then all of his male coworkers got mad at him, causehe was the lucky one.

that sucks @Xojane07 - i think it's worth approaching him and talking to him about i! as you clearly aren't happy about it. :(

January 21, 2019, 12:55:07 AM
Reply #2
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Stellar123


I’m confused - So The other girl is his girlfriend? Yes of course you should say something! You don’t want to keep thinking about this and wondering what’s going on, do you? You need to clear this up right away in order to move on.