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Author Topic: New relationship - Pace and signals - please advise

March 23, 2020, 03:49:26 AM
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Hey everyone,

I will try to make my story short. I am really confused here and would love to hear different objective opinions.
The thing is, I met this guy 2 months back at my new job, he just joined as well. We hit it off, we had chemistry so we started dating. We used to spend almost all weekends together and he used to sleep over (we only flirt, not actually having sex). After few weeks, I've noticed he started to slow down his pace.. Texting less (but texting everyday and he always initiates).. So I thought that this was him trying to send a message since he is too nice of a guy and probably did not want to hurt my feelings and I took the message and mourned whatever we had and moved on.
We had a work trip together last week, so we hung out and I casually mentioned that I received the message and it's ok, he was like there is no message and u are getting it wrong. He explained that he wanted to slow things down since it's better not to be 24/7 together. That night we slept together (shared a bed, only flirted - i am still not ready). And when we are back to the city, I saw him and he got me some gifts while he was away in his hometown. I asked him casually about us and he mentioned that we are exclusive and that he wants me to meet new friends (I'm new to the city), i told him he makes me feel like he wants to meet someone else and he said no. He is not very good in communication.
Anyway, now with the whole quarantine situation, it's been 1 week that we didn't see each other, he doesn't offer to come see me although he lives with flatmates(they closed all metro stations, blabla) and I guess I'm fine with that, it's the smart thing to do. However, we barely text now.. He makes sure to send me 1 text a day (i almost never initiate) wether it's sending a picture of whatever he is cooking or a simple how are you but that's just it, no long conversations. I'm not a strong communicator myself, I can't find things to say.
Although I trust him, my concern is that now we are not seeing each other, and with the slow pace he chose, should I be worried that the relationship will fade away? I guess my insecurities are hitting hard and I'm trying to shift them into positive thinking but I'm not sure if it's healthy to barely talk to someone.. I'm not sure if i should worry, talk to him, let it go, make him put more effort into having a conversation with me without sounding needy.
Please let me know your thoughts, is there anything I'm missing? I don't want the relationship to fade away, I like this guy.


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