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Author Topic: Lost For Words

January 03, 2020, 01:14:33 PM
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loves_critic


My fiance and I have been together for 6 years. We both have kids from a previous relationship. He spends his time with his kid on weekends and special occasions. I have my kid full time. He only ever wants to do things with just us two. He says he wants to do family stuff and spend time with the kids but never really comes around to doing so.

About a year ago, his relationship with his son went down the drain over a misunderstanding between my fiance and his son's mom. When we first got engaged, his son was happy for him that he found someone to keep him happy. Then one day, while we were out for dinner, she calls and they argued. Turns out, he had told her he wanted to take just his son somewhere their son's been wanting to go. But she goes and tells their son that my fiance has plans to take my kids and not him to this place. All the contact my fiance has had with his son was through his son's mom. Ever since then, the son doesn't want to talk or see my fiance. Maybe this is the reason he wants to get married but at the same time, prolonging it.

There's also situations where he gets invited to friends/family functions but only talks about how he has to go but don't really want to (no invite for me whatsoever) but goes anyway. When I talk about family/friends functions, he gets butt hurt and asks if I'm going to "formally" invite him by asking him to go with me. About a month before I had a family trip to the mountains to celebrate the holidays, I had told him about it. My family had told him about it as well but he couldnt say yes due to his work schedule. A month before the trip, he asks why I didn't ask him to go. I told him I did and he was the one that couldnt give me a straight answer. He says to ask him again and that he'll go. So he ended up going.

On New Years, he spends his time with family. I was waiting for him to let me know about it but nothing. He told me he didn't want to go because his relationship with his son was not good and he didnt want his family asking about it. The day of, he tells me he's going to his Uncles house to celebrate New Years. Just like that, he goes and just tells me to text him.

Out of the six years we've been together, he invited me to his family's new year gathering ONCE after we got engaged . He had friends bbq gathering that he insisted I go to. He had 8 weddings and I ended up at 2 since he was getting upset about me not wanting to go. He had 5 baby showers and never told me about any of them until the day of (which he complained he didnt wanna go but ended up going to). Seems like he only invites me to places where he would need a "date."

Throughout the years we've been together, we had our ups and downs. We had our good/happy times and our bad times. The last family trip, I wanted to be alone rather than have him there. Lately, I'm just getting more and more fed up. He's a good guy at heart, just really a hard shell on the outside. He says I'm unaffectionate and cold towards him. But how can I when I don't feel the love in a relationship. I don't know what to do. 6 years is a long time.

March 07, 2020, 01:01:05 AM
Reply #1
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samsome369


hi gal, I was in your shoes before. and here's an article that really helped me when I was struggling at the bottom.
I hope it could give you some enlightenment and inspiration like it helped me  :)

http://back.ly/Ay4dc

wish you have a great future with your loved one.

 

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