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Author Topic: Is this a red flag I shouldn't ignore?

August 22, 2019, 01:01:00 AM
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Ocelot


I've been seeing a guy for about eight months and it has generally been great, he seems to love being with me, as I do with him, and he's told me he loves me.  He is a very extrovert personality while I'm more an introvert.  Recently I made a new female friend, who is also an extrovert, vivacious and good looking.  And single.  I invited him to join us for a drink a few weeks ago and the two of them got on really well, and he seemed to show a lot of interest in her.  She told me that he'd since sent her a facebook friend request.  Now, I have no problem with a boyfriend having female friends, but......I hardly even know this girl myself, and after only one meeting with her he sends her a facebook friend request.  Is that a bit weird or am I being paranoid?  To add context to this story, the other night she and I were supposed to catch up for dinner but when I told him, he wanted to come along and cancelled his other plans.  When he arrived he sat next to her, not me, and pretty well shined his attention on her and I felt like a third wheel.  Red flag or is he just a real friendly guy?

August 23, 2019, 03:59:04 AM
Reply #1
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vexcoda


Yep - red flag, do not ignore. He is definitely interested in her. From what you say, you know the difference of what is unreasonably jealousy and that something isn't right. The fact you have written here says that you know this isn't right. Context is everything and as you say in a different set of circumstance you might not bat an eyelid - but this context, in my opinion is not okay. Your guy, if he really cares about you, would be sensitive to how this could look to you and how it could make you feel.

August 24, 2019, 08:03:02 AM
Reply #2
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Jamesw742


hello everyone.

She said she was sorry and that she would stop immediately, but even since then condoms have been mysteriously disappearing and reappearing in her purse. I want to forgive her, in my heart I have, but in my head I need to get out. The only thing keeping her with me is that I think all she wants is the house we live in. We bought it in November of 2013 using my retirement savings for the down payment. She brought absolutely no money into the purchase of the house, which didn't bother me at the time, but now I feel like she is just going to screw me right out of my house (which doesn't even feel like home for me anymore) and my future, but thanks to
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August 24, 2019, 08:39:03 AM
Reply #3
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Vinie


Definitely red flag!! If he said he loves you, he should not be acting the way he does towards that female friend. It seem you already know something is up and only want clarification. I think its best you sit him down and talk to him what bothering you. If he care about you he would stop doing the things that bother you. I hope you can sort it out.

 

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