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Author Topic: I dont want to lose him

July 29, 2019, 02:31:40 AM
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girlthatlovescats


hello, so its a long story but I will shorten it, if you want details, ask, feel free.

Over a month ago I told my best friend I liked him, he told me he liked me too, everything was cool,  but he hasn´t asked me to be his girlfriend so its weird. So this guy is bisexual, he had a boyfriend before me, and cause we are best friends I knew the story and how he liked another dude while he was dating the other guy.

So everything was going well until now he is acting weird. The other day I asked him if we were only friends with benefits and he got sad and started hugging me like if I was going to leave him, I asked him if he was sure about his feelings for me, he said yes. We talk everyday and about almost everything, always. But this week I feel him weird, when Im with him he hugs me, kisses me and protects me, he is really cute. But sometimes when we are talking in whatsapp he just dissapears, I know im not his priority and he has a life, but usually he goes away when he is sad or mad, I dont know what to do, should I ask why he doesn´t answer sometimes? should I stop sending more messages? I have noticed he also gets mad when I tell him I talk to other dudes (just friends) but he tells me some of them flirt with me, what should I do? help

August 03, 2019, 01:20:26 AM
Reply #1
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chrishen


Figure out what you want. Your boundaries. Then communicate that to him. He's giving you ambiguous signals, which is manipulative so now you need to be explicit and say what you want.

I know there is a stigma with being forward about what you want, but one boundary you should also have is to be with a guy who doesn't care that you tell him you like him and feel bad if he's seeing other people.

Put yourself first. If he's not willing to be with you how you want, you might be able to salvage the friendship and just treat it as an experience or speed bump, if you're able to go back to just friends. Otherwise, you might need to consider that it's a bad move and time shouldn't be waasted on someone who isn't as into you as you are to them.

August 03, 2019, 02:04:46 AM
Reply #2
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girlthatlovescats


Hii, thanks for replying
So I talked to him, I asked him whats up with the messages and he told me that he doesn´t answer because he is working and doing stuff, now he is normal again, and he even told her mom that we kissed... so I don´t know, I think I will give him some time to think?
I dont think he is seeing other people I just worry sometimes that he is still into his last crush, but I keep telling myself to trust him and that if something is not going well he will tell me.
I´ll keep you updated if you want

August 03, 2019, 02:20:50 AM
Reply #3
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chrishen


If you want to judge the interest level of a guy, look at his investment not his words.

So far, I don't see a lot of it.

August 03, 2019, 05:24:43 AM
Reply #4
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LVK


Hi,
Can you tell me a bit more about your contact with him? Do you spend time together? Not only talking on whatzapp or hooking up.

August 05, 2019, 04:18:30 AM
Reply #5
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Aloako


Just tell him what u feel and want. He must agree or stop contact. Its hard but i think the only way

 

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