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Author Topic: I'm confused about his feelings (or lack thereof)

December 28, 2019, 03:53:17 AM
Read 1058 times


I met him three weeks ago when we were playing Xbox together and we had a lot of fun, laughing almost the entire time. Even after we got off the game, we continued talking for hours. He added me on social media and seemed interested in me, with daily talks but after a couple of days, he started picking at random things about me and making presumptions. I'm a single mom and he kept insinuating things like I wouldn't have time for him if we did make a go of things or that he's uncomfortable that I live near my ex. I explained everything and he said he understood. The next issue was the distance; he's on the West Coast and I'm in the South. I told him that I fly to the Coast to see family so I would try to see him when I got the chance.
I think the turning point came when we began talking on the phone. He couldn't stop talking about his sexual encounters or his exes. I told him it was a bit much and, in a moment of irritation, I told him that with everything he has going on, he'd forget about me by February. He denied it and asked why I had doubts about his feelings, following up with asking if I needed a title which I refused. We ended the phone call as usual but then he messaged me on Instagram, saying that I had hurt his feelings and that I made it sound like he was a manwhore. We got on the game together and I apologized as that wasn't my intention but he continued harping on it in the game chat until I left. On Dec 23rd, he told me that he was having a rough time and that he couldn't meet my needs. He told me he needed space and I've been struggling as it's hard to go from constant talking to almost nothing.
I've sent messages and get short replies and my friend told me that he's done with me but I don't know. It's like he's pulling me in but pushing me away as well and I've never been in a situation where a guy says he's interested yet acts like this. I can see that he reads my messages; I check to see how he's doing and let him know that I'm here if he needs to talk yet he doesn't respond. It hurts to be ignored while he's active on social media, liking his friend's posts or talking to random girls while acting like me being a friend is a nuisance. I've never pushed him into a relationship or calling me his girlfriend. It's too early for that but I do like him. I guess I just need opinions on this situation as I don't have a lot of dating experience. I'm going back and forth between asking him for closure or just moving on.
« Last Edit: December 28, 2019, 03:55:48 AM by singemum94 »

March 07, 2020, 01:08:07 AM
Reply #1


hi gal, I was in your shoes before. and here's an article that really helped me when I was struggling at the bottom.
I hope it could give you some enlightenment and inspiration like it helped me  :)


wish you have a great future with your loved one.

March 23, 2020, 05:22:16 AM
Reply #2


I think you should read some useful tips and then think about your situation:
11 Strategies for Dating as a Single Mom

7 Reasons to Tell You: How Happy It Is to Date a Single Mom

Hope these tips are working for you. Good luck.

March 23, 2020, 11:47:40 PM
Reply #3


I would send one final message and ask him how he feels. tell him exactly how you feel, and see where it goes from there. Communication is key.

March 27, 2020, 03:58:05 AM
Reply #4


I was in a situation like this with my current boyfriend. It was when we first met. Everything was fine until he stopped replying to my messages frequently after like two or three months of dating. At that time I had just graduated hs and was kind of fresh out of a relationship. I took that time as a way to continue to better myself. If you were my bestfriend i would tell you to give him space and let him miss you. You said that you guys played the game together and laughed and talked. A guy doesn't find a woman that 1 play video games, 2 can hold a conversation, and last but not least make him laugh. You are a rare gem. Let him realize what he's missing. Then, he may know that you're special and doesn't know how to express it.

April 02, 2020, 12:49:14 AM
Reply #5


I understand that you said you are new to dating that’s great for the both of you

One thing about having a good relationship is that it comes from good friendship, without good friendship how would any couple be happy together

You gotta put your two sense in on the conversation and try to better understand this guy and express yourself back with things that make him better understand your friendship

You just need better friendship to understand each other

April 03, 2020, 09:06:18 PM
Reply #6


From what I read 3 weeks ago you met him. You seem to be moving pretty fast. Just be friends with him. I understand you’re interested already but right now you’re just starting a friendship. Continue to be friends then see where it leads. You want to get to know him before you jump into a relationship. I was friends with with guys for 2 years before dating. There’s no need to rush. ☺️


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