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Author Topic: How to know if you're developing feelings for your friends with benefits?

March 14, 2020, 10:09:43 AM
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holly176583


Hello, little bit confused about how I'm feeling at the moment.

Basically, I dated a guy for a few weeks, it didn't work out as he said he didn't see a future (I didn't agree, but respected his decision) and we became really close friends, and still are. A few months after we stopped dating things started to get a bit weird, he started flirting over text, a lot of sexual tension when we were alone together. So a couple of weeks ago we decided to sleep together - as long as it meant absolutely nothing. The first time, it did mean nothing as I convinced myself he was right, we wouldn't work and I'm not ready for a relationship yet. But the second time, the sex didn't mean anything but I guess it's afterwards - the cuddling, the kissing in the morning, eating breakfast together - it made me think, 'hey, if we got into a relationship, what would change?' I suppose in the back of my mind, I'm still thinking we would work together and should've given it a chance. But I'm confused about how I feel about him - I don't know if I have feelings for him, so I guess what I'm asking is how do you know? Are there any signs?


March 18, 2020, 10:28:33 AM
Reply #1
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LilyPouille


Hi Holly176583!!!

I think the moment you start asking yourself questions and you want to do more, to know him better, to feel great when you are with him, to spend more times with him.
In fact the moment, you begin to really get attached to someone ( at the beginning) is when you can't control your mind, you keep thinking about him. I guess your question is, when do you know when you fall for someone.

I would like to say for your situation is that you should maybe try to know your feelings better. Maybe ask him about the others girls ( because it's friend with benefits, so maybe he sees others girls), and see how his response make you feel?

I think you should try to know what you want of this relationship : do you want him as a boyfriend or just as a friend with benefits? Because you might get hurt , if he get what it wants (friends with benefits) but you want something more.

Keep us posted

Lily

Live. Just live.

March 20, 2020, 01:30:29 PM
Reply #2
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SnakeyNet


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