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Author Topic: How do I get him out of my head?

January 13, 2020, 09:36:49 PM
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SEChase


I have been married for 12 years. I have two kids. I have a great career, as does my husband. I love my husband, but over the years it has become abundantly clear that he will just never know how to love me the way I need to be loved. We make great partners in the life we have built for ourselves, but I feel like we are nothing more than that. I have come to terms with this and have learned to create my own happiness, but I have this sad longing for love and togetherness and protection and its just not there.

We are pretty close with several other couples that we have befriended over the past few years. One couple in particular we are very close with. Our kids get along great - we joke that our youngest two will get married to each other one day. We have a ton of fun when we are together, whether it is just the four of us, or even in a larger group. I have seemed to notice over the past year that I have a very different connection with the husband. I feel like he actually notices me - like really sees me, way more than my husband ever has. We have shared moments (nothing crossing any lines, however) where I feel like we have this special connection. It may just be the way he is with everyone - or I try to tell myself that at least - but I just don't know. He sees me. He notices me. He makes an effort to make me laugh. To be near me. He is so handsome and brilliant. I fluctuate in my mind between "wow, he really likes me - what is happening" and "no, he just must be this friendly with everyone". He does seem to make an effort to make plans with us a lot. I just try to convince myself that its because my husband is a good friend of his. I made a list of these moments we have had where I stop and notice what is happening and think that its something more. When these moments happen, I feel amazing. But when we part ways, I feel like I am torturing myself thinking about him and wondering if this is all in my head. He is married to one of my best friends. I am married and I do not want to do anything to jeopardize the life I have created. Sometimes I can't stop thinking about him though. It fades with time, but then I see him again and it hits me all over again. How do I make this stop in my head? I don't want to continue to torture myself. Thanks in advance.

January 14, 2020, 12:33:20 AM
Reply #1
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Thomasthomas


It’s hard you mite never get him out of your head even when you move on you mite still think of him

 

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