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Author Topic: He made me live in a village

January 15, 2020, 03:21:32 PM
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I moved to Taiwan in 2012.
I’ve met a perfect guy, he proposed and we got married.
I am a Western girl from a huge city and I need a big city to be happy. He is from a very small town where no one speaks English, where there is no job, no international schools and all the interests are around eating at the night market.
He moved to Taipei, it’s were we met, he got a good job and told me he planned to build his life there. We discussed many times our future life in Taipei with international schools for our future kids and I mentioned that I couldn’t live in his city. I feel lonely there(with no foreign friends and very basic Mandarin), depressed and I cannot live in one house with parents-in-law. I am very independent since I am 18, I cannot stand when people tell me how I need to live. And my mother-in-law is a very strong woman who builds the house for all her family and has all the power and money of the family.
One day when the test has shown two lines, he told me that his family and he calculated everything - I would have to move to his city because he needs to work for 12 hours and his family needs to take care of me. It would be also too expensive to keep living in Taipei. Moreover, he has to pay off a mortgage on the house his mother builds and our kids can only go to the local schools there because of the registration.
My tears and begging didn’t help, he told me that reality was different from my dreams and I had to understand his family, be less selfish and I had no choice.
My first reaction was to get on a plane and go back home where I found out that I wasn’t pregnant.
I love him but I can’t see my future in his town, I know I will be very miserable, he tells me I will love there and he doesn’t want to change anything because he needs to help his family. I also think what he has done wasn’t nice. He put me in a situation with no choice. What would you do?

March 02, 2020, 12:03:07 PM
Reply #1


He gave you no choice so i dont think you're the selfish one..

I'm also independent and i can't imagine living with his or even mine parents and them taking care of me eventhought i'm an adult

I would just sit with him and have a talk and try to think of an idea from which both of us will be satisfied.. If not, maybe it just wasnt meant to be together. :))


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