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Author Topic: Does he like me?

August 09, 2019, 11:42:27 PM
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Monica19


OK so, I got talking to this guy that I worked with. We hit it off pretty quickly. We enjoyed each others company and messaged eachother all the time till all hours of the day.
I admitted to him that I liked him and he told me he didn't reciprocate these feelings, ok cool.
Fast forward a couple weeks on a work night out, and he kisses me (properly) and admits he has feelings and he has since we first met he just didn't want to tell me.
After this, I guess you could say we were kind of seeing eachother. Meeting up, going for food (he paid) etc, any spare time we had, we practically spent together.
We were really open with eachother and shared alot of things with eachother that we'd never shared with anyone else. It was easy, and comfortable and felt right.
We started sleeping with eachother and I'd stay over at his. He'd cook me food, we'd watch movies and TV shows and cuddle, very relationshipy stuff but never said we were exclusive.
Anyways. We had a talk and he told me he really liked me in that way but didnt want a relationship. He explained he had a lot of mother issues and as such has commitment issues and hurts girlfriends (ie cheats) before they can hurt him, and so he didn't want to do this to me.
It went a little weird after this. He became really distant. Didn't message me anymore, just spoke at work briefly. He started dating other girls (kinda hurt) but they didn't last.
Recently, we've started talking again, and slept together again once.
We've continued to talk, kind of back to how we used to, chilled and open and easy again and we've been meeting up and I've been going round to his etc and sometimes when he looks at me, its how he used to look at me.
But! (there's always a but haha). Hes always telling me about girls that he likes and wants to get with etc. I just kind of go along with it like "yeah totally go for it etc" and then he kind of shuts down or moves the conversation on like "Meh maybe" or "nah". I don't get it.
Part of me thinks he's testing to see if I'm still into him and he's not getting the response he wants and then part of me thinks he doesn't like me that way anymore and he's just treating me like "one of the lads". What do you guys think? Help! Haha

August 10, 2019, 08:51:12 AM
Reply #1
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ioana


To me, it sounds like he's afraid of hurting you so he's trying to push you away. I think he likes you, if he's a cheater, he wouldn't have come back to you after being with other people. And if he tells you about other girls he may be trying to make you not like him anymore. If it's not too soon in your relationship, have a talk with him about his intentions and why does he keep sending you mixed signals like that. I hope he won't hurt you. Take care!

August 10, 2019, 03:09:55 PM
Reply #2
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JTSW


He doesn't want to commit. He's happy to spend time with you and he does like you, but that's all he wants. He doesn't want to settle down and you can't force him too. He was open and honest with you about how he is prone to cheat and that's not going to change. This is how he is. The question is, are you willing to always be his part time lover?

August 10, 2019, 08:55:04 PM
Reply #3
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Monica19


He doesn't want to commit. He's happy to spend time with you and he does like you, but that's all he wants. He doesn't want to settle down and you can't force him too. He was open and honest with you about how he is prone to cheat and that's not going to change. This is how he is. The question is, are you willing to always be his part time lover?

Thank for your reply, it's been really helpful.
I don't want to be second best, or the girl he comes running to when he can't have anyone else or can't be bothered. I don't want to be that "easy" girl he can rely on for just sex, but I'm also not sure if I want more than that either.
I do like him but I don't know if it's reciprocated, and I don't want to outright ask him incase I have the complete wrong end of the stick and ruin the friendship.

August 12, 2019, 05:45:26 PM
Reply #4
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ReneeOfHearts


I know this story all to well, find someone to love you, before you end up 12 years in waiting for him to still admit his feelings and find the courage to love you like you deserve. It you don't, your relationship will move into resentment and you will find yourselves fighting for no reason, the attacks will become personal and the friendship will deteriorate.

Being relied on like a girlfriend but not recieving what you need is the worst feeling ever.
« Last Edit: August 12, 2019, 05:52:47 PM by ReneeOfHearts »

August 12, 2019, 11:30:32 PM
Reply #5
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Missymiss


OK so, I got talking to this guy that I worked with. We hit it off pretty quickly. We enjoyed each others company and messaged eachother all the time till all hours of the day.
I admitted to him that I liked him and he told me he didn't reciprocate these feelings, ok cool.
Fast forward a couple weeks on a work night out, and he kisses me (properly) and admits he has feelings and he has since we first met he just didn't want to tell me.
After this, I guess you could say we were kind of seeing eachother. Meeting up, going for food (he paid) etc, any spare time we had, we practically spent together.
We were really open with eachother and shared alot of things with eachother that we'd never shared with anyone else. It was easy, and comfortable and felt right.
We started sleeping with eachother and I'd stay over at his. He'd cook me food, we'd watch movies and TV shows and cuddle, very relationshipy stuff but never said we were exclusive.
Anyways. We had a talk and he told me he really liked me in that way but didnt want a relationship. He explained he had a lot of mother issues and as such has commitment issues and hurts girlfriends (ie cheats) before they can hurt him, and so he didn't want to do this to me.
It went a little weird after this. He became really distant. Didn't message me anymore, just spoke at work briefly. He started dating other girls (kinda hurt) but they didn't last.
Recently, we've started talking again, and slept together again once.
We've continued to talk, kind of back to how we used to, chilled and open and easy again and we've been meeting up and I've been going round to his etc and sometimes when he looks at me, its how he used to look at me.
But! (there's always a but haha). Hes always telling me about girls that he likes and wants to get with etc. I just kind of go along with it like "yeah totally go for it etc" and then he kind of shuts down or moves the conversation on like "Meh maybe" or "nah". I don't get it.
Part of me thinks he's testing to see if I'm still into him and he's not getting the response he wants and then part of me thinks he doesn't like me that way anymore and he's just treating me like "one of the lads". What do you guys think? Help! Haha

It sounds like he doesn’t want any commitment and also doesn’t want to hurt you. But he is showing you mixed signals aswell. My advice is find someone else who’s ready to commit x

August 16, 2019, 05:47:38 AM
Reply #6
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puniversity101


Bottom-line is you're his side chick. Anytime he wants easy butt, he comes to you. He likes you, but doesn't love you, he just wants to have sex with you.
http://www.pimpinuniversity.com