My wife filed for a divorce after 9 years. I've been engulfed in work and school and neglected her a bit but we did mostly family stuff. We have 3 small children. She says I don't love her like she wants. But the thing is is she says we need to reset, that divorce couples get back together sometimes, she would still date me if I tried, and she doesn't hate me. I suspect slightly that cheating may have occurred atleast emotionally but I don't care as I has something similar in the beginning of our relationship. I really want to fix this. She did cave yesterday and allow me to preform actions below the belt on her. But said it was a mistake afterwards even tho she gave me 5 MINS to do it but it went on for an hour as she got into it. I really love this woman and can't loose her.

If you really love her and wanted to get back to her then it would be a great decision. You would really apologize strongly to her that you neglected her. I think you need to court her again if you really want her.

She is still going through with the divorce. But saying she wants me to pursue her all over again because our marriage and relationship started off all screwed up. Basically she got pregnant the first time we had sex on like the second date, miscarried, I didn't handle the situation right. Then she moved in and got pregant again and had our first son. So the whole 9 years and 3 kids later have been us trying to figure out how to love each other while under financial pressure, kid with learning disability, me a combat war vet and I guess things just finally came to a head. I'm sure there are other factors here too as I'm super intellectual and she is kinda hood street a bit. Discussions between us are usually one way. Plus she did one of those weight loss surgery and is getting mass attention while I'm working like crazy to climb the corporate ladder.I love her because it's something deeper that connects us. No matter how much I try to make myself hate her I can't. We will see if that changes once this is over and I'm homeless and have to maintain a 100k job for the next 15 years. I also hope she isn't going to just attempt to play with me emotionally to get shit outta of me while she does what she wants. Once this is over I'm going to step way the f back for like 6 months. We may take the kids places, we a condo time share in Central Florida. And maybe we can have time to discuss things then. But I'm just gonna go do my thing a bit and see where my heart is. Fortunately I'm a decent looking 37 year old black IT executive so I'm like a unicorn here in the south. So if God brings us back together then so be it. I'm just going to tell her I love her everyday until this is over and not worry about changing her mind anymore.