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Author Topic: What can I do to continue the relationship?

September 09, 2020, 05:10:11 PM
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For a lack of a better way to put it, I've been in a relationship with a woman for a month. I wouldn't say we're boyfriend/girlfriend as what we know it, but we have gone out on 4 dates, and the last 2 we stayed up WAY past the time we normally would go to bed (no sex nor sexual was involved, but we talked and were playful with each other). Quick background on her in terms of past relationships in the past, she has had bad experience with guys in the past. Most of the time, all they wanted was to get in her bed, especially her ex-fiance (who is now deceased). In the family, the guys were trouble makers while the dad had an "experience" with her. She also lost one of her older brothers this year (suicide) because of a similar "experience" he put his own daughters through (he got caught). So her trust in men isn't what I call the worst, but it isn't the greatest either.

Now, so far, things have been going well. We've known each other since we were in Kindergarten (we're 34 and 33 years old now), our family's have known each other for a long time, the family members I've met seem to like me (even her dad), and her sister is extremely happy because she had been wanting this woman to go out with me for awhile now (she had tried to set us up nearly a year ago). The past two times we were together, she opened up and wasn't sure she was relationship material. I reassured her she was because I've seen her happy and having fun every time we've been together. She had even said that she enjoys being with me (I enjoy being with her, too). I think what she's looking for is good guy who will treat her like a lady and with respect. Something that it seems she has NOT received in a LONG time.

I know this may seem old fashioned, but I don't want sex before marriage (beliefs and it just isn't right in general, imo). She knows that I had never slept with anyone and she doesn't want to derail what I've been doing. At the same time, she knows I like her and, at least I'm sure that, she likes me. I want to build up our friendship and our trust with one another before we even take that plunge of giving into our sexual desires. I had been doing some thinking and I had just asked her out to go do a movie and dinner. I want to try and pull back from the bar scene a bit and do something that's fun. I'm also looking at, later on, taking her to her favorite amusement park in the state I live (it's a fun place and she loves it). So I'm thinking more just taking time to get to know her while doing the things we both enjoy doing that doesn't involve drinking all the time. My question is what are some of things that people on here have done that you guys enjoy doing as couples that has kept you together? I know Fall is here, so would a walk in the park be good when all the leaves change color? How about a festival? Anything would be helpful.


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