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Author Topic: Obvious chemistry but girl is unresponsive

July 22, 2019, 06:11:22 PM
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anon1734


First, I want to be clear that I’m not asking for mind reading, I’m asking for specific advice for how I should proceed in this situation. Yes I realize this is a long shot, and yes I’m over-analyzing. But I’m looking for some outside opinions.

Long story short, I met this girl on a dating app a few weeks back while I was traveling. We’re both young (early 20s), type-A, with jobs that allow us to travel often. Even after her telling me that she never actually messages back anyone she meets on apps (or even really dates much at all), we exchanged numbers, instagram, etc. and we’ve been hitting it off extremely well. So well, in fact, that she invited me to drive out to see her in a couple weeks. I agreed, and so we have plans to meet in NY around the end of the month.

When we made those plans we hadn’t even talked on the phone yet, so few days ago I called her and we ended up talking for the whole night...it’s pretty obvious there’s major chemistry, especially since she asked me to travel with her before we even talked on the phone. So what’s the problem?

The problem is that since that phone call (like 5 days now), I’ve been getting some seriously different vibes from her. She’s short with me and very unresponsive. She’s backed off on her enthusiasm as well. She’s clearly is active on social media but still doesn’t text me back for hours, whereas before we were in pretty constant communication. She’s said before she doesn’t like games, but I can’t help but feel something’s up. Like one of the following:

-She’s playing hard to get
-She’s self-conscious about her over-commitment so far to someone she’s just met
-She’s just busy and I’m overreacting (not likely she’s super busy, she was traveling before and still managed to respond more)
-She lost interest (this seems extremely unlikely given how our interactions have been to this point)

What has always been the most difficult thing to understand for me is when to be assertive/chase versus when to give her space. I have not been overbearing so far, in fact I really only text her when I receive one back from her. I really don’t know what to do in this situation though. Should I chase her more? Act aloof? Call her out? Something else?

TL;DR I met a girl online and we really hit it off, we have plans to travel together soon, but she’s gotten short/unresponsive. Asking for specific advice on how to proceed.

August 09, 2019, 06:56:44 AM
Reply #1
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JTSW


If she's has backed off then it sounds like she is losing interest. Call her on it. Tell her you feel that she is no longer invested and you feel you are wasting your time. See what she says.

August 18, 2019, 06:37:16 AM
Reply #2
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kollesiko


Relations he latsn and at a distance do not have a long future. Invite a girl on a date to visit you. Arrange a romantic date. It can be like Valentine's Day. These are flowers, sweets and a cup of coffee. You can surprise her with aromas. It depends on your and her taste. An overview of excellent coffee at MyFriendsCoffee . For example, the taste and aroma of Lavazza Crema e Gusto can bring romance to your conversation. In the conversation, you will understand how anxious the girl is for you and how she relates

 

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