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Author Topic: Need Everyone's Help

March 31, 2019, 05:27:36 PM
Read 584 times


Sorry, this is a little long but I want to share as many details as I can and be specific so everyone gets as much of the picture as possible. I so appriecate everyone reading and responding.

I am a man who is 33, in a relationship but not a good one and it isn't going well. I am friends with a woman/co-worker who is older than I. She is 43 and in a relationship that isn't the best either. Her and I are close. We talk a lot and text pretty much most of the time when we not around each other. We have A LOT in common. From our past to our hobbies food, goals, etc.

By close, I mean we share very authentic hugs with each other. Occasional kiss on the cheeks. We talk to each other our currect relationships we are in. She has made statements before that she claims I keep her calm and sane when around customers/people. She claims, I do things for her that a man hasn't done for her in many years. She says that her anxiety/stress level is very high when I'm not around, I've had to "save" her several times. When things get too far for her and I'm not near by for her to go to she calls me and not her man. We miss being in each other's presents frequently. She is strong headed as am I. She go to lunch with each other as much as possible when we have the chance (2-4 times a week). We eat and drink after each other. People think we are a thing but we aren't. Guessing they're seeing something I or us don't see. She calls me babe and boo at times and I do as well. We also tell each ither we love each other occasionally, I'm assuming we both mean it as friends. She dies call other people babe and boo but the manner or context she says it to me seems to be differnet. Here are some examples of things she has said in the last week.

"I have to tell you again how much you bring so much wonderful energy to my life and how much I appreciate your support and thoughtfulness. It means so much"

"Like your haircut the last time.You have zero reasons to be self conscious..you look great even without a hat. I like it longer on top..but that's just me lol"

"Pretty sure you're in ride or die status. How often can you actually say that about someone you know"

Anyways, I'm trying to read her better. Something else she has said twice in the recent past was her man and my woman should be together since they act so much alike.

I cherish her and I's relationship to a very high level. It's obvious we make each other happy being around one another. Should the stars line up in the future should I prosue her or level our friendship as is? Or should I be looking for something else?

Thanks for reading. Ask anything you want. Comments are certainly welcome.
« Last Edit: March 31, 2019, 06:16:20 PM by Aj »

April 02, 2019, 03:14:09 AM
Reply #1


That's a very nice story. I would simple ask her the question such as. Would you want to go on a date and highlight how you feel about her n if it's something you both want then ditch the partners and get with each other.
Be bold n go for what you. Sometimes us woman are not bold enough to say how we really feel and leave it all to the man.
Best of luck and update us of how it goes.

April 02, 2019, 06:34:47 AM
Reply #2


You're a man who is 33. Really? I bet it doesn't look that way to that 43-year-old. If you want my honest opinion, man-to-man, you look like a timid boy to this 37-year-old and I bet that's exactly what she's fishing for.

She might be a FemDom, or she might be a cougar. Not my place to judge your sexual preferences, but you sound uncomfortable with the situation. To me, that doesn't read well. None of this reads well. You have to ask yourself, how in the hell does a 47-year-old woman who apparently has a successful career decide to cheat with an apparently vulnerable, younger man? An excessively polite younger man?

I think she's using you, friend. I've known a lot of women and if there's one thing women hate to lose, it's their charm and beauty. You see, women derive a great sense of identity from their ability to control men. It's pretty much the only way they can get anything done. Is a woman going to wrestle an 800-pound steer to the ground? With what? Her 66% lack of muscle mass as compared to men? No, she just gets men to do these things for her. That's fine, part of the foundation a good partnership between a man and a woman. They need us to do things, we need them to do things.

But this gal you've got on your hands sounds like the bad kind of manipulative bitch. Going after younger men, weaker prey, so she can get the sense of control she desires. From what you've told me, you two don't have anything in common. You sound nothing like her. She's playing you.

My advice is that you're better off with a gentler sort of woman. They're about, Lord knows how they're about. I know from personal experience because it took me 17 years to find the woman I was looking for. It's up to you whether you accept that one's advances. I sure as hell wouldn't, but that's me.