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Author Topic: Idk if I should call it quits

January 28, 2019, 11:32:53 PM
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I've been dating a woman for 7 months. She has an ex that follows her on social media and she follows him back. He has a way of sporadically leaving messages under her post... She doesn't seem to encourage or discourage him either. As a means to cope I told her I wouldn't look at her social media profile anymore as she said it was me being insecure.  She has an exhibit coming up next week and she is promoting it on her profile and the ex replied "this seems interesting" she responded " hope to see u there ;)" I haven't mentioned to her that I saw it because I technically told her I wouldn't look at her page anymore. My concern is I'm attending the event as well and it just seems messy for me to go.. I don't know how to address this with her without seeming insecure.
« Last Edit: January 28, 2019, 11:34:36 PM by Reem1163 »

February 05, 2019, 05:03:17 PM
Reply #1


I strongly recommend you stop watching all her social media and buy a 50 cal to deal with the guy :)
No seriously, don't trust anyone who's seeing their ex. Whatever reason they have to do it, it's bullshit. There's a difference between posting on social media and actually meeting. If you go there and she's chatting with her ex like nothings wrong: find yourself a better woman.

February 05, 2019, 06:52:29 PM
Reply #2


ditto from above message. Move on! "Hoping to see you there" isn't something someone would say unless they meant it.

February 08, 2019, 08:36:05 PM
Reply #3


MOVE ON! That's so wrong on so many levels. Has nothing to do with being insecure...no one wants to be made a fool of!

February 09, 2019, 10:12:55 PM
Reply #4


Really, you're overreacting.  So what if a friend of hers said he'll see her at a place, especially when  you're going too.  Just be mature and greet him the way you'd greet any friend of a friend.  Jealousy is very unattractive.  Confidence is sexy.
"But the rain is full of ghosts tonight, that tap upon the glass and listen for reply."

-Edna St. Vincent Millay

February 10, 2019, 07:37:05 PM
Reply #5


     Maybe she's right to call it insecurity, but she's not doing anything to make you feel secure about it. There's not much difference between leaving doors open that should be closed and opening doors that shouldn't be opened.

     Her ex is obviously a chapter of her life. There's nothing wrong with wanting to feel that chapter is closed. As for the comment that you're being jealous... Yeah, but on a completely rational level. Maybe she isn't leading him on, but she should be firm in shutting that door with him anytime he tries to open it. And if she can't do that out of respect for you, find a new relationship bro.

February 12, 2019, 07:12:31 AM
Reply #6


On the one hand, you might be overreacting. But if she was truly vested in your relationship, she wouldn't be in contact with her ex, especially knowing that it makes you feel uncomfortable.  But I could be wrong.

March 06, 2019, 09:53:40 AM
Reply #7


I believe you need to have a conversation with her and how you feel about it. If my partner really cares she would care how an action or process feels to the other individual. Either she didn't give enough reassurance or it really was insecurity but you MUST talk it out fully.

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March 16, 2019, 06:00:11 PM
Reply #8


7 months isn't a long time now in days.  If she still have her on social media than something must be going on.  Unless they have a kid together but even than they should be following each other.  I'd say move on as well, especially if she put the wink emoji.

March 18, 2019, 10:12:09 PM
Reply #9


Being an insecure person myself, I understand what you're thinking. I knew a girl in high school, and we both liked each other but never did anything about it. about a year after we were out we got together. we were seeing each other for a little while and one night I went over to her apartment for a party. She had one guy in particular who seemed a little more friendly than I was comfortable with. We kinda  separated and the next time I saw her she was pregnant with his kid. Personally, I've always found it best to go with your gut feeling.


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