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Author Topic: I went on a break and I don’t know if I can win her back. Please help.

March 08, 2020, 09:14:40 AM
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Mr Cone


So my girlfriend told me she wanted to tell me something in person. I met up with her and she told me the truth about how she has been feeling over the course of this maybe half year. She realized she wasn’t giving me the love that I deserved and that she was tired of realizing that she couldn’t love me as much as I loved her back. She told me that when we first were together we were constantly talking and now we barely ever talk or do anything, and not because I don’t want to, but because of herself. She told me I don’t deserve the way she has been treating me. She said that she wanted me to give her space. She said that until she can become a better version of herself that can give me the love that I deserve, that she wanted us to have a break in our relationship. So we did. 

This was about two months ago and I thought that maybe she was going to come back to me but she still hasn’t. I asked her about it the other day as to what her feelings were for me and she told me that if I’m not able to talk to her like a friend then it just isn’t going to work out between us. She said that there’s times when she feels like we could be together, but as of right now she doesn’t feel like we could work in a relationship and that we barely make it as friends.

She wants me to be able to talk to her just as a friend right now, but I’m not able to think of her as anything else but the girl I’m madly in love with. We have been together for 2 years and we were engaged to be married in a year. How can I win her back and change the way I talk to her so she becomes captivated by my conversations again? I don’t want anyone else but her. Please someone help me.

March 08, 2020, 09:55:00 AM
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LilyPouille


Hi Mr. Cone

First of all, i'm deeply sorry about what is happening in your life and it's great you're seeking for some help!

I think, the girl you're talking about had a realisation about her life, and she thought that having a break was the best thing to do for you two. So you accept what you thought was the best for her and your relationship.

It seems to me that you are waiting. Waiting for her to come back or her to love you the way she would. The thing is, that's a real trap. You love her, but she makes you waiting, because she knows you are waiting for her. She makes you suffer and she knows it. Plus, she wants you to be a friend when she needs to.
And you? What do you want? ''I’m not able to think of her as anything else but the girl I’m madly in love with''. So why she is hurting you?
 
''She told me that when we first were together we were constantly talking and now we barely ever talk or do anything, and not because I don’t want to, but because of herself'' --> what do you think happened in your relationship that leads to this situation? Did you feel any changes? Why did you stop talking ?

I think you shouldn't let her lead the relationship as she's doing, because you are in this together. In my opinion you should let her know that you want your feelings to be heard by her and not played with. You want to be with her, and we don't really know what she wants. Let yourself be heard. Let your love be heard.

Lily
Live. Just live.

 

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