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Author Topic: Dealing with someone who is depressed

September 06, 2019, 05:07:19 PM
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Hello everybody, I'm looking for some guidance

So, me and this girl has been talking since April. Things were going really well for some time. We talked alot (ALOT!) and she really liked me, It really showed and she often told me so. However she is diagnosed with depression (dont know all the details sorry). We met a couple of times and things were going really well.

So about a month ago she had a depressive period (still ongoing) and she didnt talk as much as she used to. Then one night we talked alot more than we had in weeks. She said it made her really happy talking to me again. So we decieded to meet up and it went pretty well. She seemed to still be interested in me. She really wanted to meet up the next day, but it was late so i asked if we could meet up the day after, she first refused and insisted on meeting that day but eventually gave in. On the day we were supposed to meet up she cancelled as she said she was really depressed but I didnt mind.

Fast forward a week and she tells me she isnt interested in me anymore, she says she doesnt have any feelings left for me even though she were more interested than ever a few days a

Two weeks ago I asked her again but she insisted that we should move on as friends and that she doesnt have any feelings left. At first I was hurt but i came to accept it, i thought that she would eventually push me away and stop talking to me and  i could then move on.

In those two weeks I've had mixed emotions, I must admit that i've been checking her score on snapchat, and shes pretty much only been snapchating me for the last two weeks. Why would still keep in contact with me but not other people.. When i stopped following her on instagram she immediately stopped following me. When I ignore her snapchats she hits me up again.

Why would she still do this even though she is not interested in me? Im confused because she doesnt like me and i want to move on, but it feels like shes trying to keep me around and get my attention.

Sure, this may all be a consequence of my own self esteem or problems that i've never taken care of. But i cant help but feel lost here. Do i keep in contact even though she only uses snapchats once per day? Or do I deistance myself and let her come to me. While I dont want to be rude to her I feel like im waisting my time on this.

She rarely leaves her house and she barely talks to her parents. I dont know if she talks much to her friends, but still keeps in contact with me. I feel sort of special but I also feel like she doesnt care about me at all. She wouldnt hit me up again after I ignore her if  she didnt think about me. Perhaps I'm overthinking it. Yeah I probably am

Anyways for you people out there with a little more experience in life, what do you make of this situation?

September 10, 2019, 01:42:36 PM
Reply #1


Depression is a terrible creature. It can make people feel totally different towards someone in seconds (they are not doing this intentionally). When depression is involved then the most likely reason she is continuously reaching out is because she needs someone there for her. She may be pushing you away at times but it seems like she really does at least in some way want you in her life. It is up to you to decide if you can deal with the emotional rollercoaster associated with it. I know it is very tough.


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