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Author Topic: Dated this girl for 2 months and now she says lets start from being friends.

April 08, 2019, 01:18:10 PM
Read 1310 times


So Ive been dating this girl that i met on tinder for 2 months. super cute and interesting on the second date she asked me to "exclusive date her" to which we agreed at that time. it was all good we both like each other. but the problem was that i went head over heels after a while and started to shower her with compliments. we met last week which didnt go as it supposed to be as i was sleep deprived which led me to being a boring at the time but according to her she still liked me. but after a day or 2 she started acting a bit distant. i wasnt even texting her all the time. i do text her instantly if she texts me but not to a point that i have to double text her and annoy her. she knows that i do like her.
then, today she texted me with "theres something important that i need to tell you" in my mind i knew what it was going to be. but i let her tell me instead of guessing. she said "The thing is that you’re way too good and I’m just me you know, I really like you alot but I don’t talk to people much and it’s so unfair and it’s kind of toxic relationship from my side to you. I’m so sorry that I’m not capable of loving at the moment i just want someone to talk to rn and I don’t want to hurt you and just hold you hostage in process of my healing, that’s totally unfair. I’m just idk not able to fall in love and have that romantic feeling for anyone but you’re an amazing guy i like you alot it’s just it’s weird my phase rn is totally emotionally not available." "how about we be friends first? Because dating is pressuring me into thinking that I’m f bad to not reciprocate what you do for me?"

In this situation what should i do? i do want to pursue this woman as i really find her intriguing .
(Thank you for taking time to read this and answering I really appreciate that)

April 13, 2019, 02:01:12 AM
Reply #1


In my opinion i would continue to talk to her as friends like she wanted and see how everything ends up. She did the right thing to tell you early rather than leading you on and hurting you.
I'm always trying my best to help. I may not be the best, just know that i have tried.

April 14, 2019, 12:09:10 PM
Reply #2


I am sorry to hear that.  Best of luck to you man. Find someone who loves you, no matter what.

April 14, 2019, 12:58:11 PM
Reply #3


Pretty classic. Her putting herself down is classic -- she's not being honest -- so she puts herself down instead of telling you the truth hoping you'll buy the whole "I'm not good enough for you" routine. Since she is giving you the "lets be friends" speech -- that really translate into her having 2nd thoughts. Why? Back to her not being honest with you. If you want to play along she'll accommodate you as long as you stay in the friendship zone. You'll tire of that. I think you should just move on. I know it is tough when you have grown fond of her but at this stage it is a one way street.

April 15, 2019, 08:26:47 AM
Reply #4


It seems clear that she idoes not see herself remaining emotionally attached to you in the same way that you are to her. She is telling you this because she doesn't want to hurt you when she does not feel the same. She intends to date other people as well as still seeing you, that much seems clear. If you are ok with that, enjoy it for what it is - but don't expect a relationship

April 15, 2019, 02:36:49 PM
Reply #5


She's realized that she doesn't like you as a boyfriend but still wants you to shower her with attention and support, meaning having the "perks" of having a man at her side without her having to offer anything in return. I'd advise you to distance yourself from her and try to date others. If she contacts you, give her very brief replies and don't give in to her requests. This is advice from a woman, trust me on this. :)

April 17, 2019, 02:30:14 AM
Reply #6


Take it slower than she wants. Pull back. Then let things natural form


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