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Author Topic: Caught in the middle of past and present lovers

September 06, 2018, 02:09:49 AM
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imconfused


My then fiance and I broke up because we realised we wanted different things. She didn’t want kids while I wanted to start a family already. About six months later a close friend and I developed feelings for each other. It all started when she asked me to babysit her child for a few days when she had to chaperone in some multiple city singles tours. It wasn’t like how it was on movies. It wasn’t very romantic or anything but rather it was like something that slowly fell into place. Sadly, just when I was about to ask her to make it official between us, she had to move away. She had a job offer in Seattle and didn’t want to commit in a long distance relationship.

By some sick twist, my ex fiance came back to the city after backpacking in Europe when we broke up. At first we were just catching up then we realised we still strongly feel something for each other. We agreed to try it out again but won’t rush it. Now, I’m kind of confused of what I feel. I think I still feel something for my close friend at the same time I know I still love my ex fiance. I need some serious advice for this.

September 06, 2018, 09:19:24 AM
Reply #1

goodevening


My then fiance and I broke up because we realised we wanted different things. She didn’t want kids while I wanted to start a family already. About six months later a close friend and I developed feelings for each other. It all started when she asked me to babysit her child for a few days when she had to chaperone in some multiple city singles tours. It wasn’t like how it was on movies. It wasn’t very romantic or anything but rather it was like something that slowly fell into place. Sadly, just when I was about to ask her to make it official between us, she had to move away. She had a job offer in Seattle and didn’t want to commit in a long distance relationship.

By some sick twist, my ex fiance came back to the city after backpacking in Europe when we broke up. At first we were just catching up then we realised we still strongly feel something for each other. We agreed to try it out again but won’t rush it. Now, I’m kind of confused of what I feel. I think I still feel something for my close friend at the same time I know I still love my ex fiance. I need some serious advice for this.

You need to be really clear and weigh up the advantages and disadvantages of both women, I think @imconfused.

You're correct in saying that you do need some serious advice because if you choose one over the other, then the chances are if you made the wrong decision, the other partner won't come running back anytime soon as they have assumed you've moved on.

You ex-finance didn't want children and you were prepared to start a family, do you think you can both overcome this, or she could change her mind?

How old are you both? Are you currently at different stages in your lives? If she focusing on her career? Why doesn't she want children?

There are lots of factors to weigh up, but you need to have a serious think about this.

Best of luck and let us know how you get on.

 

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