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Author Topic: Which do I choose? The Officer or the Diplomat?

April 03, 2020, 12:57:56 AM
Read 662 times


I have a little predicament. I'm in the Army, so I travel a lot. On one of these international trips to Spain, I met this BEAUTIFUL German man. Like, so beautiful, my extremely masculine Army buddies all agreed that he belonged in a museum. We'll call him "The Diplomat". Immediately, we had a connection - but as we work for different governments (who tell us when and where to go) we both agreed that pursuing anything was not a good idea. Instead, we have just remained friends who call occasionally, though he has visited me in the States.

So, I recently began talking to a guy in the Navy, we'll call him "The Officer".  While he is not as beautiful, he is wonderfully sweet and there is that good-natured tension from being from rival services and alumni of rival colleges. We met online and had planned to go out on a date at a midway point between our bases, but then COVID-19 hit. We have continued to talk throughout but we have never actually met in person. There has been a "what are we?" conversation, but we both kind of shrugged our shoulders with an "ideally I would have liked to have gotten dinner".

The Diplomat recently called me out of the blue and we chatted for a while, and while it was late-evening for me, it was 4 am for him. Once realizing how late it was for him, I promptly sent him to bed - also so that I wouldn't vomit out the butterflies in my stomach. Then shortly afterward, the Officer texted goodnight. If I was going to stay in the States for the foreseeable future, the decision would be clear. However, I will most likely be living in Germany within the next two to three years, close to the Diplomat, and the Officer will be stateside for the next three to four. With all connections going on in the virtual realm right now, does it matter at all? Are attempts at a coromance futile? Do I make it clear to the Diplomat that I am kinda sorta seeing someone? Am I even seeing the Officer?

Help a girl out?
« Last Edit: April 03, 2020, 01:06:21 AM by PH.LB.K »

April 03, 2020, 03:18:51 AM
Reply #1

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April 04, 2020, 08:15:12 AM
Reply #2



I think you need to be clear with what you want and need, and the commitment you are ready to do if you want to out with the Diplomat and the relationship you want with the officer. It seems you like both guys.
what I understand from your message is you really like physically the german guy, but it seems you get along pretty well with the other guy.
I think you need to choose what you want for your future, what you want from those relationship.
I would advise you to try to understand your feelings and act on them.

I really like your story!  ;D ;D

Keep us posted!
« Last Edit: April 04, 2020, 08:16:54 AM by LilyPouille »
Live. Just live.

April 08, 2020, 07:55:17 AM
Reply #3


Go to the person can made you have,its not about the position of a person okay


April 10, 2020, 02:24:52 AM
Reply #4


@mimimo289 Um, I don't really care about their positions... I was just using that as a describer so it would be easier to tell them apart. I'm my own woman and I support myself, I don't need to rely on anyone else's position...

@LilyPouille Thanks so much for your input! I think the big thing is that I haven't been able to see the Officer in person so I really just don't if there is any in-person chemistry. And you're very right, physically, the Diplomat... phew, I need the fire emoji. If I could, I would just combine the two into one person who lived in the US.  For now, I think that I will just continue to keep the Diplomat as a close friend and continue talking to the Officer a lot.  But as you asked I will keep you updated! ;)


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