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Author Topic: To go or not to go...

April 12, 2019, 12:48:11 AM
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I am not a very good person in relationships.  I have been hurt a lot.  I get insecure.  I am always anxious.  I suffer from frequent depression.  Sometimes I wonder if I'm happier alone.  I have been running from them for a long time until recently.

My new boyfriend I met online on a dating site around a year ago.  I wouldn't allow it to progress at first because of the distance but we caught feelings.  He is my age, successful, and wants to help me raise my child from a prior marriage.   We have been official for 4 months and he lives 4 hours away.  We were planning on me making the move this summer.  This wouldn't have been so bad since I have family nearby. The catch is that he was just given a promotion at work and now needs to move cross country by August.  He says he wants me and my son to come with. 

I feel really unstable about the whole thing because he is still finalizing a divorce (which was in process for awhile before we met) and also because I am afraid he won't want to be with me once I move there.  Lately he has been working a lot and his time for me has lessened.  I have also been experiencing bouts of anxiety which he assures me is alright and doesn't change his feelings for me but I just can't shake the feeling.   At the same time I am afraid of losing my soul-mate.   He says he loves me and does a lot of nice things for me but no matter what I feel like it's going to hurt me and even worse, my child, in the long run. 

If I don't go I feel like the darkness will win.  If I do am afraid it won't last. What should I do?