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Author Topic: Ex back in town , please help me...

May 09, 2019, 01:00:55 AM
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Lovey


Hello, please help me sort out this situation .

We were dating long-distance with my ex ( he's 30 and I'm 26) for nearly 3 years when he quietly disappeared after a conversation we had where I playfully told him that I didn't care if he were to leave for another woman . I've always had a pattern of playing it cool with him because I've been scared of showing vulnerability . After that day though, we were broken up for 10 months since he never really said anything but quietly disappeared. He's an avoidant who despises conflicts . I didn't pursue him but made sure rumors got to him that I had someone else, only to hurt him the way he hurted me . Two months ago though we got back in touch  and he apologised for the way he went off the radar. I asked him some help with a project when I'll be back to my country and he showed enthusiasm and support, even making inside jokes.
Knowing he's also single, I confessed after that I still loved him and told him all the truth about having been single for the past months  but also lashed out at him, telling how he broke my heart . He never responded to my email.

In 3 months I'll be back in my country. Should I let him know I'm back or just leave things this way ? I can't help but feel like there's an "unfinished business".
Thanks a lot and sorry if there are mistakes, I'm a french speaker .

May 19, 2019, 09:59:47 AM
Reply #1
Offline

whatdoIdo


I think that, when you're back, and if you want to have a relationship,
the best thing to do would be to not contact him directly, but make sure he knows you're back,
and show confidence and that you don't really need him.
Maybe then he'll switch gears and pursue you, but I don't think that it'll help
if you start pursuing him!
But I don't really know.
If he's not interested, either way won't make a difference I think, but I understand that you'd want closure.

 

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