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Author Topic: Did I get friendzoned?

November 29, 2019, 10:03:16 PM
Read 734 times

Confused L

I met this girl online 3 months ago through a gamer group that we are both part of. We text each other through discord everyday through out the day and she always texts me before she goes to sleep. She has also texted me a few times when she couldn't sleep. About a month ago we both confessed our feelings for each other and since then I felt like we were getting closer and having more deep conversations and getting to know each other. I assumed since we both told each other that we liked each other that we were more than friends now. We had been talking about her coming to visit me I live in America and she lives in England. We were playing Fortnite and I wasn't being very talkative so when we got done playing I texted her on discord and apologized to her for it and told her I had other things on my mind. She asked if I was ok and I told her I was and told her some of the things that were on my mind then apologized for dumping my troubles on her. She replied you can always talk to me we are friends. I replied Friends? and she replied Yeah aren't we and I replied Sure lets be friends and she replied You don't sound to happy about that. I wasn't I was heartbroken but I replied I'm happy that you're my friend. I'm devastated I put my heart out there and she said she thought of me as more than a friend then a month later calls me a friend. Did I do something wrong? Was I not good enough? Don't get me wrong i'm not saying she should of called me her boyfriend or something but I feel like there was so many other things she could've said if she thought of me as more than a friend or someone that she was in a relationship with. Am i just over reacting to the whole situation? She has even called me pet names like sweetums and sweet pea.

February 02, 2020, 10:23:16 AM
Reply #1


If any man wants to be honest with himself he doesn't really want female friends. They're not particularly valuable in most cases. I don't think you did anything wrong but you didn't do anything right either. Because of the me too movement and these kinds of things it's become very risky in the western world for a man to express explicit sexual interest in a woman because if it's not mutual he can get into quite a bit of trouble. You do still need to find ways to do with in as a polite and acceptable way as possible though otherwise you have no way of separating the girls that want to sleep with you and be your girlfriend to the ones that just want to lead you along for attention and male validation. I find a pretty safe way is just to ask them if they have a boyfriend. It's polite and puts forward all your intentions. That's the first thing you should ask a girl you don't want to be friendzoned with. Also trust me it's better to dissociate from a girl than be one of their orbiters. If this girl is calling you a friend she has no interest in you though and never did. If you're in any doubt then you should just tell her you like her and see what happens.
« Last Edit: February 02, 2020, 10:28:38 AM by SomeGuy »

March 10, 2020, 01:16:10 PM
Reply #2


Id like to offer my female perspective and say maybe she just called you a friend to try to motivate you to ask her to be more. I know its not fair for people to say one thing but mean another but it happens. The best way to avoid that game is to be honest about your feelings the moment you have any doubts. I don't agree that males and females can not be platonic friends because it happens all the time, it just takes a certain level of maturity to maintain a healthy relationship

March 11, 2020, 01:04:02 AM
Reply #3


As someone who’s been friend zoned many times this doesn’t sound like it
My ex and I called each other our best friends as a way to kinda strengthen our relationship. You should still ask her to clarify, see if she meant something like that or see if she no longer considers you a lover.

March 14, 2020, 07:59:15 AM
Reply #4


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