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Author Topic: He knows I'm in love with him, why make me confess?

November 10, 2019, 08:05:48 AM
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This is the continuation of this topic: https://letschatlove.com/dating-advice-women/is-there-something-between-us-mixed-signals/ full context is there :) Too long, didn't read of that topic: we had a one night stand when we were drunk, then we spent some more time together. I fell in love with him but he has a gf. He told me to just stay friends. But every time we meet (we usually drink in pubs etc) there's a lot of hugging involved, sometimes it seems like he might be a bit jealous too. And a lot of sexual attraction.

So there's this crush, he's my new friend and I think I even love him (ughh). That's important for the story. We don't meet too often and we don't text a lot, cuz we're both busy. Recently, we met and some weird things happened again.

It happened in a pub, so we were a bit drunk (but not too much, less than last time). I could see that he was really happy to see me, we hugged several times. He has a gf and that has always been an issue. If you read the previous topic, he had told me before that he's not very happy with her at the moment but he loves her so nothing is gonna happen between me and him. So on this meeting, when he saw me he said something like "actually we have an anniversary today, so I'm spending it with my friends instead of her". I didn't say anything, so he quickly said "just kidding, we're gonna celebrate tommorow". I ignored it, but later I overheard it him talking to the other male friend "I have an anniversary tommorow and u know what? I haven't prepared anything and I don't even care at all". So I actually feel like he's not telling me the truth about his relationship, which I can actually understand.

During this night, we spent a lot of time together, we talked a lot, he told me he was happy to be here and he really likes me several times. We hugged a lot, he kissed my forehead and my cheek many times too. Sometimes I would touch his hand and he would take it and put it on his cheek. He told me and the other male friend that we're his best friends in this group (from uni). He thought I'm sad for some reason, so he hugged me several times and asked me why I was sad and if anything happened. But the weirdest thing happened at the end of this meeting.

When we were leaving the pub in the morning, I went to him for a goodbye hug. We hugged and when we were in the middle of it I said something like "I really like you" or "I missed you a lot", but it wasn't meant to be a confession, I just wanted to be nice before we split. He replied to my ear "I know that's not what you wanted to say". I was shocked because I realized he actually knows that I love him. I mean, I knew he had known but I would never think he's gonna start this topic. First, I just said nothing and then I said something like "I'm not gonna tell you the truth". He started pushing me "just say it", "say it" and after several times I told him "I love you". I got really scared, so after 2-3 seconds I added "as a friend". He just replied "I know that is not what you wanted to say". I don't remember the whole situation exactly because I was too stressed out but I think I said something like "Remember that no matter what I think, I'm not gonna mess up your life" (I meant his relationship) and he just laughed and said that he knew that and that he really liked me too. And then probably other friend came and interrupted the situation.

I wonder, why did he asked me that at all? We texted briefly on the next day and he seemed totally normal, actually he was even nicer to me than usually haha. So if nothing changed, why ask me at all. I expected that he knows, so he didn't have to let me know. At first, I thought he's playing with my feelings... He just wanted to make sure? He needed some kind of self validation? I don't know. Have you ever been in a similar situation? I'm curious what was that about. If he wanted to let me know again that nothing is gonna happen between us, he could've just told me directly, like 2 months ago, but he just said he likes me a lot too.

People often misunderstand us as a couple when we're together, it has already happened to me twice and the other time my male friend told me that he thinks my crush is in love me after reading one of our conversations on FB (totally random one, nothing special so I was really surprised).

Any ideas? I feel like I really need to hear other people's perspective. Thank you very much.
« Last Edit: November 10, 2019, 07:13:48 PM by Daimon »


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