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Author Topic: In Love and Heartbroken. Please Help!!!

February 11, 2019, 12:53:58 PM
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Pandabear


So. I met this guy on an app and we were a match. I reached out to him first but he made the first move in setting up our first date/meeting. So the day we’re supposed to meet, I get a text message from him an hour beforehand and it appears to be an “accidental” text where he’s talking about having met other girls and how he liked them and is planning on seeing them again.

I texted him back asking if he had the wrong person and he apologized saying it was for his friend and that he was embarrassed. I found this really weird because we weren’t texting a lot up until that point so I found it strange he would accidentally text me. At first I expressed to him that I didn’t want to be played with but then I said I would give him another chance because he does have the right to test out the field seeing as he’s not committed to anyone.

So we still agree to meet and once we did I was absolutely enthralled by him. This guy was already nearly perfect on paper/on the web but after meeting him in person, it was like meeting my dream guy. He is EVERYTHING I could ever want in a man and the date went great. We were never stuck for conversation, he said I was attractive and he paid for the date.

Now I don’t know what happened but after the date and after texting each other that we had a really good time, he told me he didn’t feel a romantic connection. I’m absolutely dumbfounded because he seemed so into the date, even offered to walk me back and told me to text him when I got back home. I hate to say it but I’m absolutely heartbroken right now. I’m so into this guy-more than any other guy I’ve ever met, and for him to say that when things seemingly went great is just so painful. He’s about 10 years older than me so I don’t know if that’s it? But then why would he ask me out...when we talk the age difference isn’t even noticeable because we mesh so well for conversation.

Anyway I’m torn right now because I really want closure on what happened and I haven’t been able to sleep thinking about this guy. My question now is if I should send him another message expressing how I truly feel about him. I think maybe I wasn’t open enough on the date about expressing my attraction to him and I want him to know that I’m really into him. I don’t want to come off as obsessed but this is bothering me to the point where I can’t stop thinking about him and can’t sleep because even though we’ve only met once, I’ve absolutely fallen for him and no other guy I’ve talked to comes even close.

Help!

February 14, 2019, 04:26:11 AM
Reply #1
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Koko sen Neon


I truly feel for you. But In this situation it’s important to not forget the key things in the situation too. It’s seemed like you were really touched by the idea of how he was easy to talk too and the fact that he paid for the meal and also walked you home adding the gorgeous gesture of asking you to text him once you reach home. Any girl would fall for those thing but don’t forget the fact that he personally wrote to you that he didn’t feel like there was a romantic connection there. Which means he might not have felt what you have felt with him and him being a nice person he wasn’t going to be rude or offer not to pay just because he didn’t feel a connection with you. So if it’s possible I would suggest to accept thats how he felt towards you. It doesn’t define anything about you at all and move on, as time goes your definitely will be able to look back at this as a sweet memory but in the case of wanting a clear answer and a closure. I think you can just drop a message

hey, I know you had made things clear on how you felt there wasn’t any romantic connection but I honestly had a really great time with you and I would really like to get to know your better. If your up for  another date. that would be great and if you still feel the same, than that absolutely fine too.

Make sure to express your intentions and to show your not worried by the idea of him not changing his mind as it’s just for your good to get a closer and not to lose any more sleep.

All the best ☺️
« Last Edit: February 14, 2019, 04:31:56 AM by Koko sen Neon »

 

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