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Author Topic: Can i compete with his ex?

October 15, 2019, 11:39:13 PM
Read 1378 times

Big Foot

They dated for 2 years 5 years ago and broke up . I've always been just his friend. He kept waiting for her but she rejected him one last time last year and then he asked me out. We are happy together but it seems he is still in touch with her. He said he doesn't meet up with her but i found out recently he has been  having phone sex with her ( throughout the whole time we were dating)because she is living in another state. I don't believe in sex or even kissing before marriage but i'm being the best girlfriend i can be to him. Am i not enough? And why does it seem like he is always ready to help her . She has a lot of problems in her life and i feel like he always wants to save her and be her hero and says he loves her as a friend. But Why the phone sex?Maybe when we marry i can finally satisfy him?

October 17, 2019, 12:17:58 AM
Reply #1


The only way it will work for you to save yourself for marriage is if you are with someone with intent to save themselves. This man clearly isn’t wanting to save himself.

October 17, 2019, 03:11:42 AM
Reply #2


Yes. He chose you! Competition won! I think that is the best way of looking at it

October 24, 2019, 06:44:06 AM
Reply #3


If he has phone sex with her, it means he's not faithful... :( I think I wouldn't risk a marriage with this kind of person, he's not honest with you. What if he continues after marriage? It would be a disaster...

October 27, 2019, 03:23:15 PM
Reply #4


Phone sex means he's unfaithful. :/ That's not great.

November 04, 2019, 08:31:24 AM
Reply #5

Captain Black

There are 3 elements of love

Friendship - tick
Trust - No
Intimacy - No

That's why sadly I just cant see this relationship working . I think your bf is one step ahead and can see this , hence his behaviour.

November 08, 2019, 08:02:36 PM
Reply #6


After finding out about the phone sex, I wouldn't be able to trust him. Do what feels right. But now that you know he's doing things behind your back, you're constantly going to be questioning him, and you're just going to hurt yourself in the process.

January 07, 2020, 06:52:05 AM
Reply #7


Your boyfriend sexting with his ex girlfriend is a bad sign. You could talk to him about it and tell him how you feel about it. if he really sees as the most important girl at the moment and cares about you more than his ex he will understand you and respect your boundaries. If not, then i might think he is still not over his ex

January 07, 2020, 11:29:41 PM
Reply #8


 I am in a somewhat similar situation..

The ex is calling him and he is honest about the communication.  Not sure if they talk Intimately..

I just go with the flow right now but if I find out that he chooses to be with someone else..  or if they are talking Intimately.  I will walk away.   Why be the one fighting for something that is one sided?   I don't like to share..

January 10, 2020, 06:48:07 AM
Reply #9


If hes having phone sex with his ex.... do you even want him to be your partner?
Does he deserve that you are saving yourself for true love if he doesn't respect you?

March 04, 2020, 09:04:31 PM
Reply #10


This is bad news. He should not be having phone sex or any kind of sex with another woman if he's in a relationship with you. You need to know your own self worth. If he needs to be "satisfied" and you want to wait to be married to do this, it sounds like a major clash of values. I'd honestly suggest finding someone whose values align with your own. It might be difficult, but better for you in the end.

March 18, 2020, 03:01:58 AM
Reply #11


Why should you????? Put it in your perceptive

April 29, 2020, 10:30:53 PM
Reply #12


Heyya, the topic of love and relationships is a hard, arduous, and even a torturous one. However, I do believe in true love and how some things that you least expect it to happen will become true. So do hold on to some Hope.

It is important to communicate your sexual desires, for both of you. You can say that you are being the best gf to him but you need to see it from his point of view and not just yours! It is important to communicate and if your life values defers from him then maybe both of you are the right person for each other! Maybe you need someone whom is only okay with sex and kissing after marriage! If you meet that guy, then you wldnt worry about him having phonesex with others as this is against his values. And if you cannot find such a guy, maybe your benchmark is a bit too intense! That being said, you need to think of how you want to handle this and the most important thing is mindset.

I am a writer on topics on everything under the sun and I hope to share some pointers below on how to invigorate your relationships! Head on to my blog to read the whole item as it is too long to write here! funwithlife123.wordpress.com

Here is what you gonna do!

#1: Play Hard to Get

#2: Rock His World

#3: Laugh at His Jokes

#4: Find Strength in Numbers

#5: Appeal to His Sensual Side

Hope it is helpful! Do let me know what I can do to assist in your understanding!

May 18, 2020, 04:08:25 PM
Reply #13

John Athan

If he has phone sex with her, it means he's not faithful... :( I think I wouldn't risk a marriage with this kind of person, he's not honest with you. What if he continues after marriage? It would be a disaster...
That's right.  You' ve got a Point. Everything you' said is truth.

July 01, 2020, 06:21:21 AM
Reply #14


If you ever thought of becoming a Dating Coach, then this information may be very useful: https://bit.ly/3dOeVHq

July 06, 2020, 09:02:17 AM
Reply #15


No, you're worth. He doesn't deserve you. Also,You can go to this link and check -- http://myblackpartner.com.

July 14, 2020, 06:23:57 PM
Reply #16


I know people who have gone through this, it’s unfortunate, but apparently this helped https://bit.ly/3fuZ5mQ