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Author Topic: "Friends"?

September 24, 2019, 09:59:02 AM
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Bumblebee64


I recently got out of an abusive relationship a few months ago. I'm going to women group meetings and seeing a physiologist monthly to get my mental state back in order. My friends are supporting me, and I feel like I'm healing faster than expected. I still suffer from anxiety and panic attacks whenever I see my ex on my college campus, but it's starting to lessen as weeks go by. Before I began to date my ex, I was also hanging out with another guy, let's call him Trent.  Trent liked me. However, I choose to date my ex instead because I felt more of a connection with being from the same city. Trent and I still maintain a good friendship, over the 1 1/2 years I was dating my ex. In the last few weeks leading up to me breaking and leaving my abusive ex, I confessed to Trent that the relationship I was in the Ex was abusive. Trent supported me and check up on me the next few weeks to make sure I was ok, via text messaging, until I came back to my college fall semester.  Trent goes to the same college as me, and we meet in the dorms my freshman year, but this year he's graduating early.

The weekend after the first week of class, Trent asked me to hang out at his apartment, and I accepted. We ended up confessing that we liked each other and kissed/cuddled that night until I went back to my dorm at 2am. We did this a few more times in the next few weeks, but both of us we concerned that it was too soon for me to start dating again. We talked about it over texting messaging, and the result was I should stay single and don't pursue a relationship or go any further because of the little time we have together until he graduates.  I was happy that we both agreed at the time, but now I don't think I want to be just friends.

We continue to hang out and have study sessions together, but they're also that stare of "want" or "regret" we both have when we hang out. I could just misinterpret this, but it's the way I feel when we look at each other. Sometimes I see him staring down at my lips and bring his face closer to mine or finds a way to touch me.  He always asks if I'm doing ok/right or hows my day going. I stopped by his apartment yesterday to see if I forgot my computer charger that last time we had the study session. He was the only there at the time, his roommates were out. We talked for a half an hour and somehow found ourselves holding hands, but took back the romantic moment to make a joke out of it and pull back. I've invited him to a movie today, and I just don't know what I'm doing. I really like him, but I don't know if we have enough time to make a relationship out it. I don't want him to feel like he's the rebound or my 2nd choice because my 1st was awful. Should I pursue this idea of dating him or move on but still be friends?

 

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