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Author Topic: Is he toxic or i'm just a bad gf?

March 02, 2020, 12:44:57 PM
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*sorry for my english, i don't speak it on daily basis, i hope you understand what i'm trying to say*

So me (17) and my boyfriend (20) have been dating for over an year now. Everything was just magical but with with the time it just.. Idk the word for it.. It faded?

Anyways so long story short

So my group of friends.. we know since we were 1st grade and even younger. They are my closest people, like yk they know everything for me, they're my best friends.

My bf lives in a small town 10 mins away from my city and we can see each other only in the evening. Every day i used to hang out with my friends before my bf cames to get me and we go somewhere just the two of us or just stay with the group. Yeah, good, but one day my friends and him got a scandal but it wasn't something that serious they're still talking.

From this day he changed. We had a big scandals every time i go out with my friends (all girls). He wants me to text him all the time every minute, where i am, where i wil be in 30 mins and so on. He became so obsessed and got mad if i dont answer. So i stopped seeing my friends for two mounths and everything was calm and we both talked and laughed like before. But i missed my friends, like i just dumped them and didn't even realise.

Before 2 days i decided to go out with them and when i went out with him after, we had the biggest scandal for a whole year. I told him that i was going out with them and he started "what are you wearing" "are you with leggings" "I know u want boys to stare at your ass" etc. He got mad that i didn't texted him all the time and what i was doing (actually i texted him where i was and if i was going somewhere). I told him to install GPS on my phone (sarcasm) and he got furious and started punching the wall (he has never hit or do something to hurt me, he's not abusive). I tried to explain him that i barely see my friends and i can't always stay on my phone and text him. He always says that he's just worrying and other shits but i think that's just an obsession.

And after all i'm the one always guilty..

Tell me if I'm doing something wrong and what would you do if this was you.. Please ;((

March 15, 2020, 01:01:31 AM
Reply #1


So this is definitely toxic 101. Also it sounds like he’s a  narcissist and there are too many great people in the world waiting for you to leave losers like this so you can make their dreams come
True! People like this person needs to heal first and find themselves and then try to enter a relationship otherwise you’re asking for much worse behavior as things progress. Hope this helps!:)

April 15, 2020, 06:53:55 PM
Reply #2


Sweetie, I went through this, you might no like my answer though.
I was with a guy that when I was 16 he was 20, and then my ex and I were the same age in college but showed the same controlling red flags your guy has shown. It never got better, just worse. No, you'll not change him, don't even continue trying. He is insecure.

1st of all, a man, a REAL man, not a male,a MAN, will be NOT be picking up girls in high school (I assume you are in HS). If they want something SERIOUS they will look for a woman that meets the criteria of what a healthy, long term relationship meets. I'm not saying you are not a woman, but you are still in a premature stage of discovering who you are. Most guys in their 20's that go for younger girls (still in school), are just looking for sexual availability. Women their age are expecting more from them and they know they can't deliver. So these idiots go on to "date" younger girls and feed on their innocence, lack of experience and ignorance; the perfect manipulative toy.

2nd, if he is depriving you from friendships, he is the most insecure scumbag in the world. Someone that truly loves you, won't try to belittle you, or make you feel trapped. This person will worship you, support you, allow you to be free and enjoy life. He is trying to manipulate you to gain control over you, because he doesn't even have control from his own life.

3rd, Girl, those aggressive signs also happened in my last relationship, during the same exact period of time, after he already showed signs of control over me. My case, I ignored it, and then just held up to 2 extra years of domestic violence, because I thought I could change him. Nope sweetie, you are not bad gf, you are not rehab neither an emotional/sexual toy. You are in a stage where you can save yourself before it gets worse.

Take care

July 26, 2020, 12:59:16 AM
Reply #3


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