This is really embarrassing, I don't even feel comfortable talking to my friends about this. So I have just started these past couple months exploring my bicurious side. I have been my whole life, but due to my upbringing, being gay was never an option. So, it's taken a while for me to accept this possibility. I met a girl on an app, and we had a decent connection, we made out on the first date and it was by far the best makeout session I have ever had. It turned out though, she only wanted a friends with benefits relationship. At first I wasn't very accepting of this and was a little heart broken, but I eventually decided that I did want to have this physical experience, even if it meant no future relationship.
So we decided to have sex, and everything was going great until it was my turn to go down on her. It was dark, I couldn't see anything, so I couldn't tell if I was in the right area or not. I apparently wasn't, she started laughing, and when I asked for some direction, she didn't say anything. She obviously wasn't enjoying it, so I came up and tried fingering her, and apparently I still wasn't pleasing her...I didn't expect this. I thought I knew the female anatomy well enough, from, you know, practicing on myself. Also, I thought that if I was off, she would at least be willing to guide me...she knew this was my first time being with another woman. She literally just laughed at me. I feel so stupid, and like I failed. Most embarrassing moment of my life.
I think I can enjoy a lesbian relationship. I want to date other women still...but now I'm gonna be 10x more nervous to have sex with a girl again. Any advice for how I can improve? Or any similar experiences? I REALLY do not want a repeat experience.