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Author Topic: SOS from a girl who is confused about 2 guys

April 02, 2019, 05:59:09 PM
Read 1125 times


So this is a long story in the making but let me break it down for you.

Ive been in a relationship for almost 8 year (off and on as of the last 2 years) with let's call him A. During one of our longer break ups (I believe the second time) I met a guy who we'll call B.

I broke up with A because I felt suffocated by how much attention he required and how his jealousy had deprived me from even spending time with my friends. Sure the reason our relationship didn't work out was also my fault...I sucked at communicating back then and blew up whenever we had an argument. I was tired of not being able to do what other 21 year olds do (going out to bars, clubbing, vegas trips or even having lunch after going shopping!) and didnt know how to explain myself so after blowing up I decided to leave.

During the second break up I set up a Tinder account and matched with B. We hit it off right away even though we come from different backgrounds. Different races to be more precise. He's tons of fun and when were together time flies by. We have so much chemistry but ive never been brave enough to ask if he's into me in a romantic way (afterall we met on tinder). I dont want to ask because I dont want to ruin our friendship.

Fast forward to today...im back with person A for about a year now. Things are better than before but his jealousy is outrageous. He throws it in my face that I left him multiple times. He asked about B and well since I didn't wanna hide anything from him I told A about B.

B sends me so many cute messages as if he's trying to tell me that he's into me but I cant tell. He was in a short relationship a while back and he still gave me undivided attention during the relationship.

Do I ask B what his intentions are?
Do I leave A and never come back?
Should I risk things?

Give me all the input you have!

April 28, 2019, 04:24:23 AM
Reply #1



I have no advice about person B but had walked in your shoes in case of jealousy.

"Drop jealousy and love wells up. Jealousy means that I am the owner. It is an ego trip, and wherever there is ego there is poison, and the poison kills the very source of love." (Osho)

Everyone deserves a second chance. He has his but still continues that behaviour which makes you feel bad - as you say makes you feel suffocated. The question is - are you ok with this? Do you really want to continue this?

May 02, 2019, 05:19:24 AM
Reply #2


Hi there!
I believe that A should not hold past mistakes over you. I agree with a Peppere- are you okay with A bringing you down? If you decided to get back into that relationship say if it is worth it to you then they should know that it’s not okay to bring up the past. Especially if they agree to make things work.
Also with B maybe you should ask how they feel. You may live to regret it if you don’t, always wondering what if.  :)


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