I love him so much but lately I haven't been so happy. My boyfriend and I met online. He were friends for a few months and then i started falling in love with him. He lives in California and I live in Ontario Canada. When we actually started dating I went and met him in person for the first time in January this year. It was the best trip of my life. He was so perfect. He treated me right. Then I went again to see him in March and that trip was a little more rocky. He doesn't have alot of money and at that time i didn't have a job. So he was trying to pay for mostly everything which made him stressed and that made us fight a little but nothing crazy. I had a trip planned for August so I could be with him for my birthday. But a few weeks before my trip we had a really bad fight. He said some really mean things to me that hurt me so much that if we didn't have that tripped planned and paid for I would have probably broken up with him. But I forgave him just so I could go back to California to see if he treats me differently. I made everything perfect for this trip. I made it so he didnt have to pay for hardly anything. I didn't want him to stress about money. I just wanted to test him and see if he goes back to the way he was when we first started dating. That trip was so incredible! He was amazing and totally changed my mind. It's like I fell even more in love with him. But I gave him money so he could go get his passport because he is supposed to come here in January for his birthday this time. I haven't really been all that happy lately because I gave him the money but he kinda just brushes it off when I ask him when he is going to go apply for his passport. He literally has no reason why he can't go get it now. He has the money he has some weekdays off to go to the office. But I asked him again and he just flipped on me. He said I'm not happy with my life. I'm living pay check to pay check. I said to him that i wanted to help him but he said no he doesn't want to be a charity case. He wants go do it on his own and he doesn't want my money to get him to come here. He just gave up and said he wanted to go to sleep. but I told him I don't want him to go to sleep upset. So I tried talking about my day to see if that would take his mind off of it. But I ran out of things to say so it was just quiet for a while until I said hello and he answered and I said are you happy now ? He said I'm not happy about anything. Which upset me so I asked him if I make him happy and I swear I heard him say I don't know. So I broke down crying and he asked me why I'm crying and I said because you just said I don't make you happy. He then said I didn't say that but i swear i heard him say it. He then said you always make everything about you. So I went back at him and said I literally do everything I can do him. Then he just said I'm going to sleep and hung up. He always does that when we fight he just cuts me off until the next afternoon/night. Normally I would try calling him back but this time I really didn't want to talk to him anymore. I really don't know what to do I love him so much but I'm not fully happy either.