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Author Topic: How do I make sure if he really likes me or not?

January 08, 2019, 07:30:15 PM
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Levi_arts


So I am transmasculine and I have a boyfriend, we haven't been dating for long. He's almost 4 years older than me and has way more experience with relationships. He first told me that he knew from one of our mutual friends that I liked him, and he told me that he admits he likes me a bit too and then asked me if I want to try become a couple.

The thing is I still don't know how much he really likes me or what he thinks of me. He is bisexual. He told me it's a struggle sometimes because when he has a boyfriend, he'd want a girl, if he has a girlfriend he somehow wishes for a boyfriend sometimes. That he told me shortly after he took my virginity. It's also usually me who starts messaging almost every day, because I start missing him very quickly.

I feel like it's usually me who does the talking, he doesn't talk much usually. Sometimes he reads them and doesn't reply. It's usually me who asks him about himself. If I write him something like "You know I really like you very much right?" he'd answer with "uhm yeah. why?" When I say I wanna see him soon he replies with "I know :0"

When someone in a group said that he's cute he said something like "oh, well then I gotta get myself a boyfriend with a big d and make some videos on p*rnhubXD" I suppose he tried to be funny, but I feel like in front of our friends he sometimes forgets we're a couple. It hurt a bit. Maybe he just needs some time, like I said we haven't been dating that long, but I wanna make sure if he really likes me like I like him, or something else. Is there a way I can find that out aside from asking directly (because I am really not good at such things)? I really love him, and I don't want to mess this up, I am a bit scared.

January 09, 2019, 11:11:48 AM
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missg


So I am transmasculine and I have a boyfriend, we haven't been dating for long. He's almost 4 years older than me and has way more experience with relationships. He first told me that he knew from one of our mutual friends that I liked him, and he told me that he admits he likes me a bit too and then asked me if I want to try become a couple.

The thing is I still don't know how much he really likes me or what he thinks of me. He is bisexual. He told me it's a struggle sometimes because when he has a boyfriend, he'd want a girl, if he has a girlfriend he somehow wishes for a boyfriend sometimes. That he told me shortly after he took my virginity. It's also usually me who starts messaging almost every day, because I start missing him very quickly.

I feel like it's usually me who does the talking, he doesn't talk much usually. Sometimes he reads them and doesn't reply. It's usually me who asks him about himself. If I write him something like "You know I really like you very much right?" he'd answer with "uhm yeah. why?" When I say I wanna see him soon he replies with "I know :0"

When someone in a group said that he's cute he said something like "oh, well then I gotta get myself a boyfriend with a big d and make some videos on p*rnhubXD" I suppose he tried to be funny, but I feel like in front of our friends he sometimes forgets we're a couple. It hurt a bit. Maybe he just needs some time, like I said we haven't been dating that long, but I wanna make sure if he really likes me like I like him, or something else. Is there a way I can find that out aside from asking directly (because I am really not good at such things)? I really love him, and I don't want to mess this up, I am a bit scared.

Hi @Levi_arts, that's a good question and one that's rather difficult to solve when you're going through the stage that you are currently going through. It's almost like a game and having to try and work out if they do really like you or not - as you don't want to embarrass yourself, make a mockery of yourself and more importantly get hurt.

You know the situation better than I do, but by the way you explained it, it sounds like he seems very unsure in regards to what he actually wants. A boy or a girl, and like you said, when he has one or the other he's still confused. He seems very picky and unfortunately people like that end up single in the long-run.

If I am going to be honest - he sounds like trouble. I'd either wait to see what his actions are like and until you have a better understanding of his needs, or not bother at all because you may just end up getting hurt.

Please do keep us in the loop though with what happens, i'm keen to stay in the loop!  best of luck.

 

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