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Author Topic: Help me understand

February 10, 2019, 11:32:40 AM
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     So I'm in a committed relationship. My girlfriend and I have been together almost 3 years.  I love her more than anything me she is my world. As with most relationships, there has been ups and downs.

     We were long distance for about a year and a half. I dropped everything and moved there when she needed me. We lived together about a year, when she kicked me out and I moved back home to start over. I was lucky enough to move back and go right back into my old job. We continued talking, as I hadn't given up on us. A few months passed and she said she wanted to move here. I knew packing would be hard for her. Finally one night I could tell something was off. I actually talked to her best friend and we both decided to send a cop over for welfare check. I booked a flight at 2 am and texted my boss, from the airport, that I wouldn't be in for a few days. I took a week off, packed her up and moved her here.

     The beginning was rough. She didn't know anyone here and she went through a lot of depression. My work slowed for about 5 months and I scraped to make ends meet. Things have gotten better with work. Things picked up and I've moved up.

     I'm lost because there's nothing I wouldn't do or give to this girl. She constantly reminds me of how she hates it here. I can read her pretty well. I can tell when she is off or something is bothering her. I'll ask what's wrong or bothering her. In turn she gets mad and asks why I always assume something is wrong. Then a few cold and distant days later it comes out, along with the entire book of things she keeps that I've ever done. Although I may not agree or see things the same, I do listen. I do my best to prioritize fixing whatever it is bothering her. In the end I always feel like nothing I ever do is good enough.

     Lately she's been cold and distant. There's no I love yous or warm embraces. Whenever I kiss her, she turns a cheek to me or when I hug her she just stands there motionless. I come into the room to talk or go to bed and she instantly picks up her book from the nightstand and busies herself.

     What do I do?

February 14, 2019, 09:19:17 AM
Reply #1

Koko sen Neon

Why not give her this letter you’ve written to us. There’s clearly something that’s bothering her but she’s not in the right mind to talk about it’s but I feel in this situation, you have to explain to her that you want to talk about this for your situation. You want to know what’s going on as your feeling like your letting her down and how you feel helpless. Express the emotions your feeling because of the situation and he will than understand the effects of her actions and not take it as a aim on her behaviour.

Make sure to make the conversations comfortable for her as she is clearly not in a good place. If things still doesn’t work out, than explaining to her how you feel and care for her and are willing to give her the time for when she will be ready to talk would also work good for her.

All the best, stay strong


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