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Author Topic: EVER BEEN CHEATED ON?

December 25, 2018, 05:29:12 AM
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Tehilah27


Relationships are always wonderful when they start up but problems usually arise. Some problems can be worked through and others result in breakups. Have you ever been cheated on? Did it break up your relationship or make your relationship stronger?

December 25, 2018, 07:38:01 AM
Reply #1
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Caguioa747


One of my girlfriends in high school cheated on me. We worked it out for a short time, but broke up for other reasons (which was bound to happen anyway). After we broke up and I started dating somebody else, she accused me of cheating on her, after one of her friends saw me making out with this new somebody. I had to remind her that she had dumped me, she didn't believe the relationship was actually over.

April 02, 2019, 11:50:15 AM
Reply #2
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JJQW2019


Yes I cheated on my girlfriend and later she found out about it and in sted of  confronting me about it she cheated on me. We were both worng and we were able to work past it

April 05, 2019, 11:17:31 PM
Reply #3
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Thrwood


My fiance and I dated years ago and both cheated on each other.  I used to believe fully that "once a cheater, always a cheater!" ..but timing is everything.

April 06, 2019, 09:20:08 AM
Reply #4
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Amam


No. And honestly, I don't know if I would trust a cheater

April 06, 2019, 07:32:11 PM
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kamal


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May 03, 2019, 05:12:57 PM
Reply #6
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Jenna Gail


I dated one back in high school. We dated for 3 years and he wanted to make it work. I tried to but I couldn't look at him the same. I broke up with him not long after.

May 03, 2019, 10:53:43 PM
Reply #7
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Tanya


Ya my bf cheated on me but initially i tried to forgive him and start again but eventually we broke up becoz he did it again.

May 06, 2019, 11:42:32 AM
Reply #8
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Vegard


Yes I have a couple times. Hurt like hell at the time but later I realized each time that I was better off without those people in my life

July 22, 2019, 12:08:57 AM
Reply #9
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heartbroken8592


Yes I have,by someone who was the love of my life, we have stayed together but I have gotten to the point of if he did not care than why should I? When he made up his mind to cheat, he didn't care about what was at home, all the things I had done for him and me just always being there. I will be ending this very soon, there is nothing here anymore.

Sometimes maybe people do get stronger but I also cheated and have found someone else so my hearts in his hands now.

August 05, 2019, 01:52:17 PM
Reply #10
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danrich29


I thought I was being cheated on Friday and acted like a total idiot before I knew the truth. I think couples don't talk as much anymore.

Sit down and talk about things that bother them, we just break up.

August 19, 2019, 07:25:11 PM
Reply #11
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vexcoda


I thought I was being cheated on Friday and acted like a total idiot before I knew the truth. I think couples don't talk as much anymore.

Sit down and talk about things that bother them, we just break up.

Yes, a really good point!

Also think other parts of the problem are expectations from relationships can be unrealistic when we all change so much through the years and often don't acknowledge this. I think a lot of relationships end because most people equate sex with love, and if you have sex with someone else it means you don't love that person anymore. Things in love and relationships are never simple, they are complex and change over time.
Maybe the happiest marriages are the ones that have open relationships (although I am only guessing as I am not in one, but it kind of makes sense in that it negates jealousy more than any other form of relationship - in theory)

September 02, 2019, 03:03:14 AM
Reply #12
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Ceecee1995


When I was a teenager, I experienced being cheated on. I met my ex in high school and I was desperate so I got into a relationship with him. When he met my sibling, that’s when things started getting worse. I remember the girl messaged me on Facebook saying that he was writing her. I talked to my sibling about it before calling him as he lied about it. I took him back because of my sibling and throughout that relationship i found out he was writing girls saying sexual things to them.

October 28, 2019, 04:05:48 PM
Reply #13
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LostLove123


I've been emotionally cheated on, twice in the same relationship, with the second time leading to a breakup and overlap. Shit hurts and it's kinda worse than physical cheating..

November 16, 2019, 11:47:19 AM
Reply #14
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Derrick 2193


Going through some cheating issues now. We are working through it. But trust is becoming an issue. Especially when I believe my partner still wants the cheating to happen

November 18, 2019, 01:43:49 PM
Reply #15
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hueylong4prez


How do you even define "cheating"? I have been difficulty deciding where the line is exactly drawn.

I have actually been debating the issue here: https://beta.trustory.io/claim/1930

I do think that physical contact is required for cheating, but a lot of other people in the discussion seem to think you can emotionally cheat by getting non-physically intimate with another person.

November 18, 2019, 08:38:38 PM
Reply #16
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Murough


I have been cheated on and been the cheater. In my experience if cheating takes place the relationship is broken. When I got cheated on I was not important to those men. They were short term relationships that they never really cared about and were too lazy to properly end. When I did it it was a bit different. I committed to a long term relationship and every time I did try to leave that relationship my ex refused to let me leave peacefully. He would throw tantrums to get me to stay. Lots of suicidal threats. I ended up having a full on affair for like a year and half. He was totally aware and didn’t try to stop it because he didn’t want me to leave. After the other man broke my heart because he disappeared on me. I tried to bury myself into my bad marriage. I blamed myself for being unhappy with him and was disparate to be super wife. I became a stay at home mom and hid myself from any contact with the outside world pretty much. For a while I was under the belief we were fixed and stronger but it was because I had isolated myself so bad and any depression I would tell myself was just me being broken. Eventually my kids got older and it was more realistic for me to branch out and go do things like karaoke while my husband played video games and the kids slept. The more I settled into being a normal person again the more trouble I had with my husband though. He got mean and everything went right back to the way it was. I found a friend at karaoke and little things about him reminded me of the guy that got away. It freaked me out and I promised myself I would be very careful it always stayed friendly because something about him made me feel like I should have him in my life. He ended up becoming my best friend and sure enough over time I feel for him hard. I ended up torturing myself for 5 years just being his friend while my home life was miserable. All that time he felt the same way but sent me home to the wrong man every time we parted because he didn’t want to break up a family. He always knew something was wrong and he wanted me but he kept hoping for my kids and my sake that I was just going through something with my husband that could be fixed. I felt so much guilt over the affair I had had that I put myself through hell trying to stay just friends with him. We just never talked about the elephant in the room. I cannot count the number of times we were mistaken as a couple because everyone could see a spark between us. By the time we finally got together it was celebrated in our social circle. Friends would tell us “I always knew you two were going to end up together”. Anyone that had been around us and seen how depressed I was were just excited when they found out I was getting divorced . Giving in and leaving my ex husband to be with him was one of the hardest things I ever had to do but the best decision I ever made. Everyone is happier now. I am,kids are, my ex and of course my boyfriend. So from my experience cheating is a strong sign of unhappiness and trying to grow stronger from it could act as a bandaid for a while but in the end eventually you need to admit you wouldn’t feel such a strong need to be with someone else if the person you have was right for you. Recently I had a good friend I do feel close to and I am attracted to confess his feelings for me. I had to break his heart though because I couldn’t see myself wanting to leave my boyfriend. I have zero desire to leave him or cheat on him with this other man and that’s because I love him and even when things are hard I just know he is the one.
« Last Edit: November 18, 2019, 08:47:32 PM by Murough »

November 23, 2019, 05:05:36 PM
Reply #17
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Pytamazin


Yes I have been cheated on so many times by the same person. Then the new person I’m with wants me to be okay with them dating many females. Only them.

February 03, 2020, 06:40:38 AM
Reply #18
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SomeGuy


You don't stop caring about the person after they have cheated on you but it adds a level of resentment to the relationship that makes the relationship no longer worth continuing with. The fact is if someone cheats on you once they're almost guaranteed to do it again so the trust is broken. If the partner never admits to it and tries to emotionally blackmail someone into dropping the accusation that's also a big dealer breaker for me. I've had very few experiences where cheaters actually admits to it even when basically being caught red handed. I think it's better for yourself and better for the partner if you always ditch someone who cheats on you. You're showing yourself that you have standards and a level of self respect and you're showing them that there are consequences to their actions and they can't get away with any piece of bad behavior they want. Sometimes you just have to set your emotions aside and do the right thing. Do cheaters ever learn and stop cheating after enough failed relationships? Unfortunately I would say many of them never do. Some people are just too compulsive to enter into a functional and stable relationship. 

February 04, 2020, 02:21:55 AM
Reply #19
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leahnoelle


Relationships are always wonderful when they start up but problems usually arise. Some problems can be worked through and others result in breakups. Have you ever been cheated on? Did it break up your relationship or make your relationship stronger?

I found out one day my husband of 28 years had a secret life for the last 10 years. He'd been a regular at sex clubs throughout the region, had been spending thousands a month on prostitutes, and had a (cuckholding) relationship with a couple for two years. He'd even invited this couple to spend their vacation in our home for a week. They had sat at my table with me and our kids each night, and I had no idea they were his lovers.

He cried and claimed he had sex addiction, my world fell apart and I suffered PTSD-type symptoms. Stopped eating for a while, couldn't sleep, couldn't be in public without crying.
He claimed he never stopped loving me, and wanted to fight this compulsion. He wanted me to track his phone, go with him when he had to travel for work, be alert.

I asked that he see a therapist. All he did was lie to the therapist and not tell him about his secret life. The therapist diagnosed him as a sex addict and compulsive liar.

I couldn't handle it. I left and got another place to live. Tried to go on with my life. After 6 months we tried to reunite again. We tried forming a different type of relationship, but the lying and cheating started again after 9 months and I ended it. In the middle of divorce now.

There is still care between us, love... but sometimes love is not enough to overcome some obstacles.

February 07, 2020, 09:18:18 AM
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Adamsv11


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February 07, 2020, 08:13:34 PM
Reply #21
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clivec


I think so.  She will not admit.  She said she was too drunk to remember anything,  but can describe his genitals.

March 02, 2020, 02:16:40 AM
Reply #22
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shirayuki0205


Technically yes, but he hasn't cheated on me or hasn't cheated with me.

 

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