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Author Topic: 17 years together and married 10... now I feel like I’m in the twilight zone

July 03, 2019, 10:53:13 PM
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This is my first time on the forums and I'm a little uncomfortable sharing my information, but I really need advice. If you are taking the time to read this message, reply or offer advice... thank you. My wife and I started dating in May of 2002 in August 2004 we had sex for the first time as I was her first. For many years I have walked around thinking we have had a great marriage... with our problems but solid. I felt we have had a great sex life as my wife is constantly teasing and initiating sex I was under the impression I was satisfying her sexually...never felt giving her multiple orgasms was a problem... About 3 months ago after having sex I woke up to my wife moaning and calling Raymond one of her coworkers as she was masturbating, I waited angrily for her to finish and then popped up asking her why she felt the need to do that beside me, that if I didn't satisfy her to let me know or least tell me what she wants so I can try to fulfill that need... also if that isn't what she wanted we have a guest room because listening to my wife call another mans name in our bed made me uncomfortable...she only laughed at me and told me I was dreaming...I guess as the days went by I became more suspicious of an affair so I hired a private investigator because instead of helping me understand the issues so we could work through it my wife would just become argumentative and shut down. After about 6 weeks he said there was no affair but daily fondling and flirting at work with 3 separate black coworkers one of them was the one she was calling out that night. The race wasn't really an issue but I am white so it made me question is my wife's sexual interest only in black men, could that be the reason she wasn't being satisfied...was she fantasizing I was a coworker when we were intimate... this only drove the angry and jealousy. So I decided to dig deeper and one night I grabbed her laptop and cellphone and looked at her search history's. To my surprise it was 100% black porn not even one other race for nearly 10 years.... I'm not innocent and yes I have searched porn but I search a little bit of everything but she had 0 deviation. I repeatedly verified but nothing except black. So I became even more suspicious so i started reading my wife's diaries that were hidden in the closet... I know I shouldn't but jealousy and anger is driving me insane at this point especially when she refuses to address the issue. I wasn't really surprised as I was already aware from the PI's pictures and videos that her and at least 2 dozen black coworkers over a period of 12 years were aggressively fondling one another as she works in a huge multi-floor hospital. She had identified a coworker on nearly every floor and based on her floor and assignment she would chase them down by messaging them through facebook trying to find out where they were during her 12 hour overnight shift. She would discuss in great depth how they would draw in hers hands, rub their cheeks together, pinching each others legs, running their hands through her hair, rubbing her sides breast area and once grabbing her butt. She also wrote how this would really excite her and she would have to masturbate nearly every shift in supply closets, break rooms, parking garage and driving home after work fantasizing about these coworkers. While reading the diaries I recognized a lot of the names except 1... all are black. My wife would describe her feelings, emotions and sexual excitement towards these coworkers throughout her diaries. Several of these "crushes", "profiles" and "preferences" as she would call them... she also stated that she may be in LOVE with with at least 5 of them. Do you think my wife is married to the wrong man.... would it be better to divorce as I just want her to be happy. What are your thoughts? What should I do? Do you think my wife's true sexual preference is black men?

July 11, 2019, 10:20:37 AM
Reply #1


If you're not aware, it's a HUGE fetish/reality for white women to be into black guys. It's risque, naughty, and well we all know the size stereotypes. How many guys fantasize about Asian women? It's so common as a genre, and even conservative white men actually set up real black men to be with their wives on a regular basis as they watch.

Women have their fantasies, and if it was just that, masturbating wouldn't bother me.

IF it were me, she crossed a line, which would be an instant divorce. She is purposely cheating on you (most likely sexually, but proven emotionally) by messaging real-life coworkers. Let alone the disrespect of using their name, masturbating next to you.


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